The appointment
Printed From: OHbaby!
Category: Support
Forum Name: Coping with infertility
Forum Description: Have you been trying to conceive unsuccessfully? Dealing with primary or secondary infertility? Get support, advice, and help coping here.
URL: https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=8269
Printed Date: 05 July 2025 at 5:48am
Software Version: Web Wiz Forums 12.05 - http://www.webwizforums.com
Topic: The appointment
Posted By: ginger
Subject: The appointment
Date Posted: 14 June 2007 at 7:06pm
DH's semen analysis was worse than we thought (less than 5% normal), and therefore it would be a bust to do anything short of IVF. I was hoping we could do an IUI but apparently that's only worthwhile with minor male or minor female issues, and certainly not both. So, it's IVF and ICSI at that. Apparently a standard cycle (where the sperm fertilise on their 'own' ... well as much as these things are left to their own devices when they're monitored to the hilt in a lab!  ) would probably be a failure, and ICSI is the only bet laying money on.
The decision now comes as to who we see treatment through ... Fertility Associates or Fertility Plus. For publicly funded cycles, we have to go through Fertility Plus. So, do we wait, and go public, thus leaving the $10,000.00 in our savings (once we've saved it! ) and just suck it up, or do we spend the $10,000.00 to stay with FA? If we put the application in to go through the public system and it's accepted, and we do a private cycle that doesn't work, we still have to stay with F+. You only get to do the whole, pay for private treatment, stay with the provider of your choice, if the private treatment is underway before the application to go public goes in apparently.
What to do?  $10,000.00 is a lot of money. Plus, it's not like we're under any time pressure - I'm only 28, so my fertility isn't going to get worse if I wait a year (I sincerely hope!), but ... well.
Fun and games! 
I refuse to mope though. I'm still kind of processing, but there are people worse off than I am, and I have plenty to be thankful for ... we will have our baby, it's just the how of it that I'm mulling over  ------------- Cuinn Lachlan 23.1.09 - 22:00 Antonia Helene 4.8.11 - 09:41 |
Replies:
Posted By: miss
Date Posted: 14 June 2007 at 7:31pm
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hey ginger, sorry to hear that things are a bit worse than you thought.
now I am not too sure what to say, so i am gonna ask questions. How long do they estimate it will take you to get to treatment time on the publicly funded regime? Is it much longer than you estimate it will take you to save? If you do go for the public treatment and it doesn't work, you get one more chance - is that right? After that, if they second chance doesnt work either so you have to go private, can you go with whoever you want? I wasn't quite sure what you meant about that in your post (sorry if I am being thick!) I guess I would look at the time delay in going public compared to saving - if it isn't ahuge difference then i would go public, hope and pray that one of the free ones work (and we will be there hoping along with you)then have the money building up either as a backup if it doesnt work, or a lovely nest egg for maternity leave! |
Posted By: busymum
Date Posted: 14 June 2007 at 7:38pm
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Is it possible to go on public but when your $10,000 is raised, change to private? -------------  |
Posted By: nikkitheknitter
Date Posted: 14 June 2007 at 7:57pm
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Hrmmm... choices, choices.
Don't know much about either... but there can't be thaaat much in it...? I say get on the waiting list for public and put the $10,000 towards the Moochi fund. 
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Posted By: ginger
Date Posted: 14 June 2007 at 8:18pm
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And that, folks, is why we love Nikki It's aaallll about perspective!
Miss ... basically, yes. We can have our 2 public goes, and if they don't work, we can go private with whoever we want. But, if we are on the public waiting list, we have to go with the provider we are registered with, which would be F+. So, if we've been on the waiting list to see F+ and decide to do a private cycle with FA, and then our public funding comes up, we can't then switch the public funding to FA. Does that make sense? I'm a bit bollocks at explaining things
The waiting list is around a year I think, and we could drop off it any time we wanted if we got the $10,000.00 together first. We'd be able to raise that in less than a year ... but then, if people are dropping off the IVF waiting list, and our name could come up sooner than a year ... Or, if it took us 9 months to get the $10,000.00 together, is it better to keep the $10,000.00 and wait the extra couple of months for publicly funded, even though FA might be our preferred clinic? (and good point Nikki ... maybe there's not, you just hear more about FA because they have a higher profile? and, let's face it, if we're on the list for F+ and everyone else wants to go to FA, then we'll jump up the waiting list, won't we? )
I'm pretty sure we're going to start saving flat out, go on the public waiting list, and see how it goes. But, get back to me tomorrow ... ------------- Cuinn Lachlan 23.1.09 - 22:00 Antonia Helene 4.8.11 - 09:41 |
Posted By: topcat
Date Posted: 15 June 2007 at 7:15am
| Dam, hi, ginger sorry to hear your news... i posted you a message on the thread you replied to me last time in... For what its worth I'd go on public list, start saving money and see what happens... you might come up the list sooner, and then give it a try, then you have 2 or three options, not just limiting them if you go private to start with and then if it happens first try you got a baby fund started, plus you nice and young if the list is a year, I was told that my age (33) was still plenty ok yesterday so you still have time on your side |
Posted By: noodle
Date Posted: 15 June 2007 at 12:42pm
Ginger i agree with topcat  (and nikkis suggestion sounds tempting too)
if it was me i think i would keep saving but also have my name down for public funding that way you are keeping all you options open. good luck with your decision ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: busymum
Date Posted: 15 June 2007 at 1:24pm
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Gosh Ginger that was a lot of in your last post. Are you feeling just as today? (I hope you are! ) ------------- |
Posted By: caraMel
Date Posted: 15 June 2007 at 1:41pm
What Topcat said makes sense to me too, and Nikki's made lots of sense 
 from me, making complicated decisions sucks ass.------------- Mel, Mummy to E: 6, B: 4 and: 
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Posted By: SMoody
Date Posted: 15 June 2007 at 1:42pm
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How about saving the money. Put your name on the list for the public funding. Wait a year or a year and a half and if you dont get pulled pay for it. If you do get pulled you already have the cash for all other baby expenses. ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: yummymummy
Date Posted: 15 June 2007 at 5:28pm
Sounds like a really good plan - best of luck ------------- http://lilypie.com">  http://lilypie.com">
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ginger wrote:Posted By: james
Date Posted: 15 June 2007 at 6:49pm
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hey ginger i relly dont know what to say but you and your hubby are in my prayers ------------- <a href="http://lilypie.com"><img src="http://b4.lilypie.com/nLJ5p13.png" alt="Lilypie 4th Birthday Ticker" border="0" /></a> |
Posted By: pikelets
Date Posted: 15 June 2007 at 7:23pm
So sorry to hear that things were worse than you had thought Ginger. 
We were told that once we paid for private treatments through FA, we could stay with them for any public treatments. I'm confused now. That is why DH and I had booked to see FA so we could pay for IUI and then stay with them so they can do our publicly funded IVF. Gosh, its damn confusing.
At the seminar we went to, FA said they had the highest success rate, so that is something to consider. However, if you know that you only have to wait about a year for public funding, then it is definately a bonus waiting for it as everyone says, you will have $10k in the bank for bubs if all went to plan. And as you are 28, you do have some time on your side. Thats a hard one. Just take some time to digest everything they told you so you can make the right decision. Good luck
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Posted By: ginger
Date Posted: 15 June 2007 at 8:18pm
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It is really confusing Star. If we go on the public waiting list, even if we opt for private treatment, as we are assigned to F+ for public, we have to stay there for private too apparently. FA won't look at us for an IUI because it would be a waste of time (it doesn'k work for couples who both have issues, and DH has a double defect), and athough we could pay for private, we'd have to do it immediately, or else hold off going on the waiting list until AFTER our private cycle. But, one positive thing for F+ is that their waiting list is shorter (because everyone wants to go through FA, but still!) We could come up for our publicly funded cycle around the time we'd have gotten the money together, so may as well get some freebies!
And thanks everyone! I'm doing OK. Just coming to terms with it I suppose! One good thing is that there is no rush now. My fertility won't decline in the next year, and we're going on the list, so it'll hopefully only be a little while before we're on our way. ------------- Cuinn Lachlan 23.1.09 - 22:00 Antonia Helene 4.8.11 - 09:41 |
Posted By: noodle
Date Posted: 15 June 2007 at 8:39pm
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Yay Ginger I'm glad you have made the decision and i hope the wait isn't too long, is it a weight off your mind now knowing the exact course of action, and that all decisions have been made and that it IS going to happen?
I'm so excited for you and think you are an amazing, positive and a great influence to have on the infertility board (not that you would want to be here if you had your way! a bit like us all ) but thanks Ginger you help to put ALOT of things into perspective!
------------- http://lilypie.com">
http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: ginger
Date Posted: 15 June 2007 at 8:48pm
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I hope so too Noodle! Fingers crossed anyway! Either way, even if it's a year (FA told me this afternoon though that F+ waiting list isn't that long though! ) a year isn't so bad ... I mean - it only seems like a few weeks ago it was Christmas, and it was 7 months ago! So, we'll get there!
You're right - it is a weight off. Knowing now that all there is to do is sit back, wait, and save for baby ... it's a comfort to know that although we have to go through this, there is a 50-60% chance of a baby per cycle. I'm realistic that it may not happen first pop, but it doesn't stop me chanelling every positive vibe I've got!! And borrowing everyone elses too! Lucky everyone is pretty into sharing around here ------------- Cuinn Lachlan 23.1.09 - 22:00 Antonia Helene 4.8.11 - 09:41 |
Posted By: noodle
Date Posted: 15 June 2007 at 8:59pm
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Yay for fertility+ waiting list not being that long! and positive thinking will make it happen!!!!I'll sure share mine with you!!!! ------------- http://lilypie.com">
http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: lizzle
Date Posted: 15 June 2007 at 9:07pm
| Sorry to hear your news ginger, but cool that you have a (kinda) plan. what is the difference in the clinics? like, is one REALLLLLLy good and the other crap? Or just not friendly etc? |
Posted By: pikelets
Date Posted: 16 June 2007 at 8:28am
I totally agree with you Noodle. Ginger, you have been such a good friend to many on this board and I hope it all goes well for you. You are so positive and I really admire that coz I know how hard it can be. Its must be a relief to finally have some answers and a plan. Like you said - even if it is a year (which it wont be) it will go fast. Just think, with each day passing you are one step closer....
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