Remembering baby?
Printed From: OHbaby!
Category: Support
Forum Name: Life After Miscarriage
Forum Description: Up to one in five pregnancies ends in miscarriage, yet for many the loss of a pregnancy is isolating and lonely. Share your thoughts and feelings here with others who have experienced loss.
URL: https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=41775
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Topic: Remembering baby?
Posted By: Kellz
Subject: Remembering baby?
Date Posted: 23 March 2012 at 12:53pm
Not sure what we want to do yet. I like the idea of the 4 of us saying something about baby and releasing some balloons.
Did you bury baby? Can we do this in a cemetery or do we have to find somewhere at home to do it- we wont be here forever and dont have family land that we can bury baby on either.
Just after ideas really. Thanks
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Replies:
Posted By: Pook72
Date Posted: 23 March 2012 at 6:06pm
Kellz, sorry for your loss.
We have a special place to remember ours and each time we have put a white rose into the sea! We also got married there so such a special place!
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June 99. June 09, Dec 09, Sept 10 March 12
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Posted By: MandzG
Date Posted: 23 March 2012 at 9:10pm
Hi Kellz
I brought myself a really nice heart necklace, and also we have a remembrance tree. It is only tiny so is in a pot on our deck - we will probably have to plant it at some stage but for the next few years it will be ok.
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Dec 2011 Feb 2012
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Posted By: Kellz
Date Posted: 25 March 2012 at 8:10pm
Thanks for your comments.
Do you have baby buried at your special place/ under the rememberance tree?
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Posted By: MandzG
Date Posted: 25 March 2012 at 8:15pm
Hi, I didn't bring either of my babies home, on reflection I kind of wish I had.
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Posted By: Kellz
Date Posted: 25 March 2012 at 8:35pm
Yeah Im really undecided as to what to do- we said we didnt wanna keep baby, but now I think I would like to- baby has been sent for histology and then the hospital brochere says it will be kept for 3 months then if not collected will be cremated, so I guess I can still change my mind.
But we still have our 2 kids placentas in our freezer- after 2 and 5 yrs, and I dont want baby in there too- we have no idea where we wanna bury them.
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Posted By: tigger,roo
Date Posted: 25 March 2012 at 9:10pm
hugs Kellz, sorry 4 your loss.
we didnt keep our and i really wish we had 4 our 1st one especially.
hope you and your family are doin ok
------------- http://lilypie.com">
http://lilypie.com">
Angels - March'11, Nov '10, May '10
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Posted By: Princess_Bubs
Date Posted: 14 April 2012 at 5:20am
Kellz - I am so so sorry for your loss.
Although probably not entirely legal, my Angel babies are buried somewhere public (on a hill thatl looks over the sea) I love having somewhere physical to go on Anniversarys, due dates, or if Im just generally feeling crappy about my losses. I really do recommend thinking about something like that. My placenta will go up there too. It makes me feel like our family of "five" are all together somehow xx
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http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow">
Two Precious Angel Babies 2010 / 2011
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Posted By: Kellz
Date Posted: 14 April 2012 at 8:37am
Thanks.
As we still have our 2 kids placentas in the freezer, we have decided that once baby is returned to us from the hospital- still not back from having tests done in Palmy, we will buy 3 big pots and so each child ( including angel baby) will have their own pot with placenta planted and a tree in it.
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Posted By: Pepi-bebe
Date Posted: 15 April 2012 at 7:45pm
Hi Kellz,
We had a dear friend weave a beautiful flax box with a fitted lid to place the baby in, and with the last one we placed dried roses from our wedding in it. Then each time we buried them in a pretty, quiet, sunny spot on my families land. It turns out we don't visit there that often, but I think in time we will, it's just a bit hard at the moment. I wanted to put the first baby right near what is now our house (we weren't living here at the time but were planning it), but my brother had a friend who buried her baby right beside her house and she found it just really hard to have it so close. So we chose a spot that is a few minutes walk away and secluded. We planted a lovely tree there too that is deciduous with pink flowers in spring, then red heart shaped leaves - it's gorgeous! Called a Forest Pansy. We also brought two scented pink roses, which have been in their pots all summer (eeek), but we will plant them outside our window, so they are near us.
It was really hard burying the tiny woven boxes with our precious babies each time, but we made it as special as we could, those boxes are full of tears though. I think for me and my DW it was an important part of the grieving process, as with MC you don't get to properly see or hold you baby, so having something to bury and cry 'over' was really helpful to grieve for our baby. I hope having your baby returned helps you and your family too.
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Oct 11 & Mar 12
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