Did I cheat?
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Category: General Chat
Forum Name: General Chat
Forum Description: For mums, dads, parents-to-be, grandparents, friends -- you name it! And you name the topic you want to chat about!
URL: https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=4170
Printed Date: 08 May 2026 at 5:45am
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Topic: Did I cheat?
Posted By: CuriousG
Subject: Did I cheat?
Date Posted: 23 October 2006 at 3:48pm
| I was induced and had an epidural - the other day someone told me with great venom that I cheated in childbirth - since then I have felt really bad and wondering did I cheat? Do you really have to feel all that pain for it to be a 'real' experience? |
Replies:
Posted By: EthansMummy
Date Posted: 23 October 2006 at 3:50pm
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Not at all. That is a horible thing for someone to say. ------------- ** MUM TO ** Ethan 29/08/2006 Brooke 22/09/2008 |
Posted By: james
Date Posted: 23 October 2006 at 3:52pm
who would say that it does not matter that you felt no pain it does,nt matter how babys get here all that matter is that they get here and are healthy and happy what kind off person would say that thats horrable big hugs hunny ------------- <a href="http://lilypie.com"><img src="http://b4.lilypie.com/nLJ5p13.png" alt="Lilypie 4th Birthday Ticker" border="0" /></a> |
Posted By: CuriousG
Date Posted: 23 October 2006 at 4:18pm
| Thanks - at the time I just brushed it off but you know, with over tiredness your mind starts thinking about it.... |
Posted By: Maya
Date Posted: 23 October 2006 at 4:33pm
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After having an epidural with Maya I wondered why anyone would NOT want to have one, it was great! I had the twins without one but not by choice! And I was induced with them, but I dare anyone to say I "cheated"! -------------  Maya Grace (28/02/03)
 (02/01/06)
The Gremlins:Sienna Marie & Mercedes Kailah (14/10/06)
Lil miss:Chiara Louise Chloe (09/07/08)
Her ladyship:Rosalia Sophie Anais (18/06/12)
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Posted By: mum2emj
Date Posted: 23 October 2006 at 5:01pm
| i agree, that was a horrible thing for someone to say to you! you definatly didnt cheat at all. i have had one epidural out of my 3 births and it didnt make it any easier!! |
Posted By: Bizzy
Date Posted: 23 October 2006 at 5:15pm
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i didnt know childbirth was a test???
sounds like sour grapes to me...!! ------------- http://www.myfitnesspal.com/weight-loss-ticker"> 
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Posted By: AlyAyde
Date Posted: 23 October 2006 at 5:17pm
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OMG they must be jelous lol. How septic of them. Before i had kids i went to the birth of my friends baby and she had an epi after being in such pain it was so nice to see her relaxed. I was like im going to have one of those when i have kids. Unfortunately im wayyy to bigger wuss of needles that by the time the pain got to bad to bear it was too late for an epi.
I think that medicine is great now days how it can give the mum pain relief. It doesnt matter how the baby gets there, you created life. Be PROUD. ------------- Jayde 25/12/04 Alyssa 08/04/03 http://Alyayde.bebo.com |
Posted By: Guests
Date Posted: 23 October 2006 at 6:31pm
| awww Georgia!! If this is the same Georgia i know an luv you have and are doing a GREAT job with Charlotte shes very very very lucky to have you as a mum!! Ella loves you to and also thinks you def didnt cheat!! Ur a trooper! I would have punched that person in the goolies!!! |
Posted By: mummy_becks
Date Posted: 23 October 2006 at 6:31pm
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OK i so never cheated and I was induced. I didn't have a epi thou as I have a slight fear of them. You never cheated, there are so many different ways to give birth and they are all different as to the situation of labour or pregnancy. ------------- I was a puree feeder, forward facing, cot sleeping, pram pushing kind of Mum... and my kids survived! |
Posted By: lizzle
Date Posted: 23 October 2006 at 6:55pm
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cheated! That is such a crack up! so only those who go into labour naturally, and have no pain relief "pass". what a gyp!
I was lucky enough to not have to have an epidural, but less because I didn't want one, and more because my births weer both very fast. Question: does she have kids herself???? |
Posted By: jack_&_charli
Date Posted: 23 October 2006 at 7:22pm
i was going to ask that myself liz! what a cheek to say something like that! 
i had 2 c-sections....what would she think about that! ------------- http://www.alternatickers.com"> 
http://lilypie.com"> 
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lizzle wrote:Posted By: Guests
Date Posted: 23 October 2006 at 7:33pm
| Im sure she wouldnt be saying it if she was induced!!! |
Posted By: linda
Date Posted: 23 October 2006 at 7:38pm
| Who knows what would have happened if you didn't do what you did. Everything turned out well and that is the main thing |
Posted By: fattartsrock
Date Posted: 23 October 2006 at 8:28pm
I wasn't aware that there was a medal being awarded to "real mums" who have no pain relief and go on time.... In the words of that great poet, Pink, YOU MAKE ME SICK!! (not you, but the "owner of such a terrible comment..)------------- The Honest Un PC Parent of 2, usually stuck in the naughty corner! :P |
Posted By: MILF
Date Posted: 23 October 2006 at 8:46pm
well i had TWO injections of pethadine for my induced labour! i am a big BIG cheater then! i remember how awful i felt when my mil told me with great pleasure that my sil didnt need pain relief during her labour - as if it is a competition to see who copes best with what. Turns out she had gas, which i count as pain relief, but it still burns me having someone say that to me. so i feel your pain! seriously, you could slap them and blame it on hormones, noone would blame you at all. ------------- Lyla - mum to Xanthe - my big 4 year old 
and Jordis - 1 year old 
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Posted By: Jay_R
Date Posted: 23 October 2006 at 9:01pm
Send all people who make comments like that to the 'f@$k off island' I say  I went 18 hours after being induced without pain relief, and when they decided i needed a c-section I was given an epi and I tell you what, if there is a next time then I will be getting the epi again, this time as soon as I am allowed one!!! Like Annie said, there aint no prize for not having one, and it's up to us, the ones in PAIN to decided what we want!!! Thats a big GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR from me!!!
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Posted By: my2angels
Date Posted: 23 October 2006 at 9:07pm
| I had an epi with kobe and loved it. Plus i was induced and had an epi with Addison although it they let it wear off to early but hey we have still done the whole childbirth thing, and how ever they have come out we all have beautiful healthy children. In 5 years time no one is goign to even be asking what the birth way like or if you had a c section or VB, does it really matter that much |
Posted By: Paws
Date Posted: 24 October 2006 at 12:14pm
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If you cheated then so did I!!
I was induced and granted I did go without pain relief for a good deal of the labour I did end up sucking back on the gas and having an epi (I would still happily marry the guy who adminstered that!) and after 6 hours of not progressing any further I had the emergency c-section. Sorry but people like that need a good slap upside the head. It's no wonder some of us endup feeling bad about our choices or things that have happened to us during childbirth. (yes I am pretty peeved about that comment being made to anyone!!!)------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: Jay_R
Date Posted: 24 October 2006 at 12:37pm
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And also, apparently the pain is worse when you are induced, according to the doctor at Greenlane who sent me to be induced. So being induced is NOT cheating. And neither is having an Epi, or a c-section, or whatever!!!! Ok, getting Grrrrr again
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Posted By: nikkitheknitter
Date Posted: 24 October 2006 at 1:23pm
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Geez, I have more pride in the people that copes for a million hours before having pain relief than my pityful begging for pethdine as soon as I walked into the hospital!
As Han gets older, I realise how little child birth matters in the scheme of things. I felt really weird about my birth experience, like I didn't do well enough. It's only now after seeing so many people's different experiences that I realise that no one really cares how they get here!  (It's now my failure as a mother to a toddler that I have to worry about )
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Posted By: jax
Date Posted: 24 October 2006 at 1:32pm
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Sheesh ! I would have wanted to slap someone making a comment like that too, at the very least had it been me I would have b*tched them out until they apologised from the shame Every woman is different, every birth experience is different, and as Nikki has pointed out; by the time you get five years down the road, it's not likely to matter a whole lot how they came into the world. What matters is that they are happy, healthy and loved !
Personally, I count myself *lucky* to have not needed more than a few puffs of gas, not better than anyone else because of it. So a big GRRRRRRRRRRRRRR from me too. ------------- Jacquie - Mama to Erin, 13.07.06 - Chief Cat Chaser & Marmite Sammie Eater 
Love many, trust few, harm none. ~Anon~ |
Posted By: busymum
Date Posted: 24 October 2006 at 1:47pm
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Georgia, looks like you hit a hot topic!
With #1 I had c/s and epi and with #2 I had epi and episiotomy... but I certainly don't count those as cheating or failures. I had to cope with other people's opinions after the c/s but it truly was a matter of bleed to death or have the c/s, so stuff that. As my DH said to me, go sneak a look at your baby while she's sleeping and then try to say you failed/cheated. That baby is priceless regardless of birth choices. ------------- |
Posted By: 11111
Date Posted: 24 October 2006 at 2:32pm
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I had an epi with my first and I think it was harder then going with out one. It is not cheating at all you do what you have to do get through it And like Jax said I consider myself lucky having been able to have no pain relief with Mikey certainly not better. ------------- Deborah Mum to:   
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Posted By: Roksana
Date Posted: 24 October 2006 at 3:16pm
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Bl$@& Biatch..&$#^$* (&^$$(&$ $(^%)*&%)v )&%%$)^$....
Is all I have to say to the person with such intelligence!!!
I went with out paid relief for 36 hours and then had an epi and ended up with a c section. I am damn proud of myself and next time perhaps will have an epi earlier (in case of long labour). ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: daikini
Date Posted: 24 October 2006 at 4:38pm
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I, too, consider myself lucky that I was able to have my kids without pain relief... having said that, I consider the spabath I was in a form of non-medical pain relief! The decisions about whether or not to have any form of drugs is so individual both to the woman and the delivery... and has nothing to do with anyone not actually involved!
I read your post to my husband... he was horrified that someone would actually say something so "disgustingly stupid" (his words), and I am too. ------------- Becca, mum of 2 girls & 3 boys |
Posted By: luna
Date Posted: 24 October 2006 at 4:47pm
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Ohh what a topic. I also got told that I 'cheated' - let's just say I fired a fairly growly email back (I'm sure HE was being funny, but 3 days outta hospital, I didn't think so).
I was also induced and managed no pain relief for some time, but a few hours after the drip went in, I had an epi (best thing out)! Then went on to have an emergency c-section at the end of a 40 hour labour. I cannot understand why people think you 'cheated' when you have an epi or a c-section ... what is WITH that????  ------------- Selina http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: Jennz
Date Posted: 25 October 2006 at 12:20am
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I'm another induced/epi-er! Charlotte was in distress and it was either that or C/S- they don't induce you for fun, they do it because they need to get the baby out. I didn't want an epidural but was made to have one as I had been having contractions for 48 hours at that point and had had no rest- again they said it was rest up so I could push her out or have a C/S. That comment just shows her ignorance.
I must admit I don't have an awful lot of respect for the "to-posh-to-push-ers" or others who get induced a few weeks early to avoid stretch marks but when its medically necessary who is she to judge? ------------- Jen, Charlotte 7 & Kate 3 
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