For those who do not use CIO/CC...
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Category: Have A Baby?
Forum Name: Toddler Times
Forum Description: Is bubs growing up and getting into everything? How do you train them to use the potty? When do you start feeding solids? Share your tips and advice here!
URL: https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=39596
Printed Date: 09 August 2025 at 3:49pm
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Topic: For those who do not use CIO/CC...
Posted By: 1st_Time_Preggies
Subject: For those who do not use CIO/CC...
Date Posted: 15 June 2011 at 8:05pm
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........I am just wondering whether your little ones did in fact eventually learn to go to sleep on their own and stay asleep the WHOLE night (7pm - 7am) eventually?
My DS has always been a horrid sleeper, but around one year I night weaned (am still bfing now) and we got him sleeping through most nights and if he did wake it was because he was cold, or even just for a quick cuddle and back to sleep. THEN we had ear infection after ear infection, and the last sickness was a Urinary Tract Infection which was HORRENDOUS. During these times I have ended up feeding him at night again for comfort and he has often come into bed with me. Up until the UTI he used to still be able to go to sleep on his own and would nap during the day okay. However once he got this infection, ALL sleep went out the window and he wouldn't even GO to sleep alone let alone stay asleep. He has finished the antibiotics but now has a bit of a cold. And the day naps are starting to improve, but we still have to be in the room for him to go to sleep, and he wakes at least three times a night. During the day he is extremely clingy and is a super mummy's boy. I want to be there for him, make him feel safe and look after him, and have no problem tending to him day or night if and when he needs me. BUT I would love some reassurance that he will in fact sleep ONE DAY. Or is all this just creating a bad sleeper for life??? |
Replies:
Posted By: Kellz
Date Posted: 15 June 2011 at 9:02pm
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I could have written the same post about my DS (17months)!
We think he was doing awesome to quite often be sleeping through or only need a quick cuddle to get back to sleep in the night - hes waking several times at the mo cos hes been teething again for 3 weeks then got ear infection- hes bf again in the night too- was night weaned at 11 1/2 months. We are definatly not worried that he will be like this forever tho, cos DD was a shocker of a sleeper- had not slept longer than about 2-3 hrs in a row by this age, but now sleeps perfectly and has done for ages now. Shes never slept 12 hrs tho. Not every kid sleeps 7pm-7am. Both my kids have always been early rises too- up by 6am, when other peoples kids sleep longer and later. Not every adult goes to bed at the same time every night, wakes at the same time every morning and always sleeps through either!! |
Posted By: newme
Date Posted: 15 June 2011 at 9:17pm
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I personally think you are doing the right thing! All kids are different, and it sounds like your boy has a lot of needs to be met - and you are meeting them.
My first son is very similar - had very bad reflux as a baby and would wake up to 12 times a night and I would feed him back to sleep every time. He needed lots of help getting to sleep too. We had patches where he would self settle for a while, and would sleep through, and then he would go back to needing help. He is 3 years, 3 months now. He goes to sleep without help, often sleeps through, or else he may get up and get into bed with me, but will then sleep through to the morning with no problem and without disturbing me much. Which I am happy with. I consider him to be a good sleeper. He has always been quite clingy and is still shy around many people, but he is happy and confident in himself. It is just his temperment. Also, I have a 6 month old son too, and he is a great sleeper. I did nothing different, it is just the way he is. So I think good sleepers are born, not made. You are doing a great job, and it won't be forever :) |
Posted By: hils10
Date Posted: 16 June 2011 at 10:23am
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I'm sure he will get there eventually - especially if he does sleep through occasionally when there is nothing bothering him.
My 16 month old is getting more and more consistent with sleeping through (around 11 hrs) and we have never done CIO or CC and always pick her up for a cuddle in the night if she needs it. We have to be in the room for her to go to sleep at night but it doesn't take very long and it doesn't mean that she wakes during the night looking for us - now she only wakes if teething or ill (which unfortunately is fairly frequent as shes only just started getting teeth and gets a cold with every one!). She has never been a real nightmare sleeper but was waking 2-4 times a night every_single_night from about 5.5 months to 1 year old. When she was nearly 1 her sleep just started to improve by itself (soon after I stopped bfing but I don't know if that had anything to do with it). I have a friend who's kids are terrible sleepers and they were sleeping through by around 2.5 yrs with no sleep training. I reckon youre doing the right thing making him feel secure while he's sick (i would want someone to give me a cuddle in the night if I felt sick!), and you'll eventually end up with a good sleeper! |
Posted By: 1st_Time_Preggies
Date Posted: 16 June 2011 at 1:11pm
| Thank you guys, you have made me feel much better :-) |
Posted By: Mum2ET
Date Posted: 16 June 2011 at 1:14pm
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Ella never slept through the night until she was 2 and now is a brilliant sleeper. Up until then she was waking once or twice a night for a feed and then as once I weaned her she started sleeping through staight away
I live in hope that the same thing will happen with Tom.... ------------- Mum to Ella (5) and Tom (2) |
Posted By: Emmi_
Date Posted: 16 June 2011 at 2:40pm
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Love this thread!!
DD isnt a good sleeper, still waking 5/6ish time a night for a feed.. I threatened to night wean her when we went to the states (been here for a week)b ut then she started to only wake once or twice a night (but up at 5am instead of 6.30  ) which I could live with.. after the trip here shes gone back to being not great, but its only been a week. If shes still shocking when we get home (end of july) I will night wean her in the hopes that someone else can settle her and I can actually get some solid sleep!
No matter how hard it gets I havnt been tempted to CIO/CC, am so glad to see others who have managed with out it too  ------------- 
+1 May 09 Angel 
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Posted By: caliandjack
Date Posted: 16 June 2011 at 4:39pm
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Thank you so much for this thread, DD is 7 months old and waking once sometimes twice in the night for a feed and a cuddle. No two nights are the same and she had slept 10 hours on occasion.
I don't want to do any CC/CIO as to me it doesn't make any sense. My one attempt at VR was a classic fail. It's nice to know that she will eventually sort her sleep out herself and its ok to continue to feed her if she wakes in the night and demands it. When and how did you ladies manage to wean off night feeds? ------------- http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow">   [/url] Angel June 2012 |
Posted By: newme
Date Posted: 16 June 2011 at 7:01pm
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I weaned DS1 off night feeding at 20 months. It was one of the most difficult things I have done! I was totally over feeding at night, he would just clamp on to my breast and wouldn't un-latch, and would just lie there like that.
So I just did it cold turkey. He was having at least 3 feeds a night. I went to bed with a bra on, then a skivvy, then a PJ top, so that there was no easy access (more to stop myself from caving in), and when he wanted a feed I just cuddled him. We had two nights of crying for hours, then the third night he slept through for the first time ever (but that didn't continue). But just a note, I didn't leave him to cry on his own. I held him and cuddled him, tried to calm him as much as I could, we watched Foo Fighters DVDs (his favourite) in the dark for a couple of hours until he finally fell asleep. Was really hard, but was really worth it. |
Posted By: caliandjack
Date Posted: 16 June 2011 at 7:40pm
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lol at watching Foo Fighters DVDs!
It's good to know its ok to continue to night feed DD for now, sometimes I feel pressured to make her sleep at night when the reality is she's still very young and expecting her to consistently is unrealistic. ------------- http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow"> [/url] Angel June 2012 |
Posted By: hils10
Date Posted: 16 June 2011 at 8:36pm
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I tried offering a bottle at night instead of bf as I figured that it might break the sleep association and I could also gauge whether she was actually drinking and gradually try to cut down the amount. I also tried really hard to just offer cuddles when she first woke for a feed but that didn't really work as even if I got her back to sleep she would just wake up again an hour (or less) later until she got some milk and I actually got less sleep!
For us the sleeping through started before she had completely stopped having milk at night IYKWIM. She would sleep through some nights, wake once or twice other nights and if she wouldn't settle any other way we would give her half a bottle (100ml). She gradually just seemed to stop needing that and a cuddle became enough. |
Posted By: caliandjack
Date Posted: 16 June 2011 at 8:46pm
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hils10 how old was she when she stopped? ------------- http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow"> [/url] Angel June 2012 |
Posted By: hils10
Date Posted: 17 June 2011 at 9:14am
| Probably around 12-13 months when she started consistently not having milk at night. |
Posted By: caliandjack
Date Posted: 17 June 2011 at 9:45am
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Typically after thinking sleep was a rare thing, DD slept 7 hours between 10.30pm and 5.30am! I feel like a million bucks. ------------- http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow"> [/url] Angel June 2012 |
Posted By: Emmi_
Date Posted: 17 June 2011 at 11:42am
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Did anyone have to NOT actively night wean?? Like did their DS/DD start dropping their night feeds by themselves? (especially those who were having feeds every 2ish hours?) -------------
+1 May 09 Angel
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Posted By: High9
Date Posted: 17 June 2011 at 12:19pm
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Emma, Lily was still waking about 1.5-2 hourly during the night at 15 months. I personally would never have done CIO, we did do a 'mini' version of CC but it was on my terms. In the end, what with my operation and everything, MIL and DP DID CIO with DD and I was very upset by this as I had asked them not to but they saw no other choice! Pissed me off tbh because I spent 15 months of having 2 hourly or less broken sleep and they couldn't do it for 2 days! She's a fantastic sleeper now but I guess before I lived in hope that one day she would sort it out herself. I didn't mind the night waking. I have always found that the more sleep I have - the worse I feel.
I'm not sure about the feeding as Lily reduced her feeds around 9-10mo but by 1yo she had picked them all up again and then some and we were having about 16 feeds during 24 hours! I think separation anxiety may have had something to do with it... The first day I was gone apparently Lily signed for milk constantly. And then stopped until I came back and she was very upset I couldn't pick her up etc and couldn't really 'cuddle up' to feed... She'd often just give up and go to sleep 
I myself didn't sleep through until I was about 2.5-3 and my mum attempted CIO without success but my grandma never allowed it! Emma, I am sure they will eventually but I think the whole 'knowing' how to settle without help - helps... We are still cosleeping with DD but now instead of a feed she just crawls over, cuddles up and puts her arm around me, gives me a kiss and goes back to sleep then rolls away once asleep... So she still needs some reassurance but not a feed... Some nights she doesn't come over for a cuddle and kiss but some nights she does. I still wake about 2x a night anyway - always have! ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: fire_engine
Date Posted: 17 June 2011 at 2:21pm
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I've done CC/CIO during the day, but I don't do it at night - I feel it's a different situation when it's dark and a little cool. DS1 often, but not always woke for a feed (bottle) until he was about 2 and we just gradually reduced the milk and increased the water in it. He got there!
------------- Mum to two wee boys |
Posted By: Nikki
Date Posted: 17 June 2011 at 9:31pm
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This really probably doesn't help but answering the question - my kids slept through without CC/CIO - DS had heart surgery at 6 weeks so slept like a prem for a while after that (he was still at his birth weight due to the heart failure) then he slept through from 12wks. DD slept through consistently by 5wks. So some kids just like their sleep I think! DS is 4 in less than 2 weeks and still has a day nap any day we're home!
But both had phases of waking -- DS around 6months when he'd been really sick and gone back to night feeds for comfort, and we did do 2 nights of crying after that. It worked well for him and didn't take much crying. Same thing around 16/17mths. The only times hes ever come into our room before 6am is a few nights when he's been throwing up (been in a bed since 19mths). DD rarely woke before 12 months but has had a few patches since then, I end up cuddling her or sleeping in her room and after a couple of nights she goes back to normal - her waking is due to teething / being sick usually. Crying would not work so well with her as she has a very different personality and was waking only when something really bothered her (not just habit). ------------- DS (5yrs) and DD (3yrs) |
Posted By: rachelsea
Date Posted: 18 June 2011 at 6:52pm
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Hey, yep we've never done CIO or CC, and our DD finally started sleeping all night about a month after she turned 2, and started going to sleep by herself a week or two ago, without needing me to stay till she's asleep. She's even gone back to having naps some days and still going to bed at night!
She weaned herself from BFing at 13months so it was a whole year after that that she started sleeping thru lol. Hang in there, he will figure it our when he's ready  I'm glad now that we let DD sort her sleeping out in her own time and didn't force it on her, even though it did get very frustrating sometimes!! ------------- DD 4yrs DS 2yrs http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow"> 
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Posted By: Emmi_
Date Posted: 19 June 2011 at 2:49am
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Glad to hear C is sleeping so well Rach, esp with the new arrival and all that!! Must be good to not have to worry about her getting up in the night (and nice if they both nap at teh same time!!) -------------
+1 May 09 Angel
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Posted By: sarasal
Date Posted: 09 July 2011 at 11:49am
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DS's sleep improved heaps around the time he turned 2, and he started sleeping reliably right through the night somewhere between 2 - 2.5. It coincided with the end of teething, which we had a terrible time with. He really needed comfort at night when he was in pain or sick.
We co-slept and breastfed through the night right up until he started sleeping through on his own. Hang in there, you will get to sleep full nights again one day :) And good on you for caring for your baby through the night... it is really good for him to know you are there for him. |
Posted By: caliandjack
Date Posted: 09 July 2011 at 3:01pm
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It is good to know they will sort it out themselves, we've had a challenging couple of nights with DD waking 3 and 4 hourly and then every hour from 2am last night the only way she would settle was in my arms, which is difficult for me to get any sleep in the middle of the night.
I can't handle her crying/screaming, DD doesn't co-sleep very well. ------------- http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow"> [/url] Angel June 2012 |
Posted By: 1st_Time_Preggies
Date Posted: 09 July 2011 at 7:51pm
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Good to hear sarasal :-) Caliandjack, been there and still go there occasionally. I think my son just has a really low pain tolerance. So if he is sick, teething or uncomfortable he will cry out for me. His sleep improved over the last few weeks to waking only once (other times but putting himself back to sleep) but now he is sick AGAIN so no doubt the sleeping will go out the window :-) It has helped to stop fighting it and just accept that this is the way it is for now
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Posted By: tiptoes
Date Posted: 10 July 2011 at 11:41pm
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We're finally getting a few more sleep throughs, last night was 6.45pm-7am which was awesome and we had a 8-6 two nights before so the sleep throughs are getting closer together. Every time he's sick or teething we go back to lots of wake ups, but the last tooth (out of the first 16) is nearly through so I'm hoping that we might start seeing more and more sleep throughs!
Now I just need to be able to get rid of this pregnancy insomnia before baby #2 arrives so I can have a wee bit of sleep in between 
Formerly chelle ------------- http://alterna-tickers.com">  
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Posted By: caliandjack
Date Posted: 11 July 2011 at 7:54am
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DD is going thru a very unsettled time and I'm struggling to get enough sleep, is this an 8 month old phase? Will it pass?
Feeding her doesn't work it calms her as soon as she goes back into her cot she starts crying/screaming again. ------------- http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow"> [/url] Angel June 2012 |
Posted By: Nikki
Date Posted: 11 July 2011 at 10:40am
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Seperation anxiety starting? does she get upset if you leave the room during the day too? (I can't quite remember back that far now - maybe I've blocked it all out!) ------------- DS (5yrs) and DD (3yrs) |
Posted By: caliandjack
Date Posted: 11 July 2011 at 5:06pm
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No during the day she's mostly fine.- I've taken her to creche for the first time today and she was fine, she hasn't spent any time away from me in the last 3 months since DH has been away with work.
She has been waking at night after less than a couple of hours asleep which is new for her, normally she'll do a good 5 hour stretch at the beginning of the night. ------------- http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow"> [/url] Angel June 2012 |
Posted By: sarasal
Date Posted: 11 July 2011 at 7:09pm
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Around that 8 month time was a nightmare for DS's sleep - heaps of teething going on and also it's around the time of learning to crawl, so heaps of brain development going on.
They do go through those difficult periods - for us they'd usually last a few weeks at a time. In hindsight, each time I realised there had been a reason for it, eg pain/illness/growth spurt/developmental milestones, so I wished I'd been more patient. |
Posted By: caliandjack
Date Posted: 11 July 2011 at 7:25pm
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DD has started crawling and she's now busy trying to pull herself up, I guess its knowing that it won't last and I just have to be patient and work thru it with her.
Knowing that its normal and that it will end eventually makes it a little easier to cope with and get through. ------------- http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow"> [/url] Angel June 2012 |
Posted By: 1st_Time_Preggies
Date Posted: 13 July 2011 at 7:01pm
| Yip, my DS definitely had sleep issues around the 8 month mark. No doubt your wee one is working through the crawling and pulling up so that is keeping her (and you) up at night :-) |
Posted By: Nikki
Date Posted: 13 July 2011 at 9:41pm
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Oh yeah developmental milestones like crawling and walking seem to do it too. And theres usually teething going on around then as well. Its all just a phases normally and will settle back down in a week or two. ------------- DS (5yrs) and DD (3yrs) |