When do you start telling people?
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Topic: When do you start telling people?
Posted By: kiwiking
Subject: When do you start telling people?
Date Posted: 15 June 2011 at 9:46am
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So far only DH and myself are in on our news (as well as you guys) and we're not confirming it with the doctor until tomorrow.
How far along did you wait before you told anyone? I'm including parents, closest friends, rather than the whole world. I'll be keeping it secret from work until 12 weeks and that includes colleagues as I'm not really best friends with anyone here. I don't want to tell people right now as it's still too soon but another 7 weeks seems like such a long time! ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
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Replies:
Posted By: _Deb_
Date Posted: 15 June 2011 at 10:55am
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With #1 I was 9 weeks before i had the courage to tell people. lol. Not sure why really, probably just 'cause i was 19 i guess. But we had been together for 4 years and he was planned. I made myself tell my family then since i was having a scan and thought they might wanna be there. I told them via text message. Hehe. So we told everyone else after that.
With #2 i told my family straight away, so at 4 weeks. Then we told everyone else too. ------------- 
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Posted By: ....
Date Posted: 15 June 2011 at 11:11am
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I told my mum and best friend straight away at around 5 weeks, just because I had to have someone to jump around and be excited with, and I knew those people would be the ones I needed most if anything went wrong.
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Posted By: Cinderella
Date Posted: 15 June 2011 at 12:03pm
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I had this conversation with DH yesterday. I want to get all excited and start telling everyone and he wants to wait. Told him I will wait one month. lol I will be 8 weeks.
I have let slip to my mum and my best friend simply to have someone to share it with. DH doesn't want to get excited yet. After having to suspected m/c in the last 6 months I don't think he actually believes it yet. |
Posted By: babygiraffe
Date Posted: 15 June 2011 at 12:10pm
We told our parents when we hit 8 weeks and have just told brothers/sisters and close friends (who know our history) at 9 weeks. I felt nervous telling them...as though we might jinx ourselves! We will tell more of our friends as I feel comfortable...so over the next few weeks and the rest of the world around 12 weeks 
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Posted By: Henna79
Date Posted: 15 June 2011 at 12:36pm
| With our first we were so over the moon that we told family at 6 weeks and our second has been any different although this time around it is the worst kept secret out so a lot more people than I was happy to know know. |
Posted By: choco69
Date Posted: 15 June 2011 at 1:05pm
i told my immediate family and a couple of friends straight away - then after my 7 week scan told another couple of people - after the NT scan I announced to the world!!!  ------------- http://lilypie.com">  
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Posted By: caliandjack
Date Posted: 15 June 2011 at 1:42pm
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I told our parents straight away as we'd been ttc for a while and my parents were visiting the week after I found out so we told them then.
Didn't tell work till 12 weeks. ------------- http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow">   [/url] Angel June 2012 |
Posted By: High9
Date Posted: 15 June 2011 at 6:37pm
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Family between 9 (mine) and DPs (16 weeks VERY LATE!). We didn't tell friends until 20 weeks - gender. And I wasn't all that close with my dad so think I was about 25-27 weeks when I told him!
Pretty much tell who you feel comfortable telling and when you feel comfortable telling them. That was what we did. I honestly didn't feel the need to tell people and had a lot of fun with people going 'Is she? Isn't she?'  ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: rorylex
Date Posted: 15 June 2011 at 7:23pm
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I think it depends on people situation and the people you are choosing to tell.
my 2nd I kept it to myself only telling a close friend as ds1 was only 3-4mths just felt if i left it longer to tell people they wouldnt be so shocked at age gap. last 2 babies we very much planned so I was so excited I told all my close friends as soon as i knew. next time however we wont be telling anyone for a little while maybe the odd person but I want it to our little secret just for a while, dont think it will take long coz I cant keep my mouth shut. ------------- Mummy to 4 boys Samuel - 18.6.05 Rory - 15.7.06 Mason - 13.06.08 Emmett - 24.01.10 Baby #5 - cooking |
Posted By: CrazyCass
Date Posted: 16 June 2011 at 9:58am
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We told a couple of friends that we are close to initally... simply because My mum has a big mouth and we wanted to get past the 12w NT scan with the all clear before the world knew.
It was nice having our little secret - and it actully made telling people hard - there are still lots of friends & family we haven't told simply because we forget  ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: TwinnyBump
Date Posted: 16 June 2011 at 11:49am
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Its really a personal decision when you start telling people, all I can say is do it when it feels right for you. Don't feel pressured by family and friends.
I told my Mum at about 4weeks, the rest of our families at about 7w, and a few close friends around 10w. I've only just told work this week at 14w. Like you CrazyCass I loved it being our wee secret, it kinda feels weird telling people! ------------- http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow">  
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Posted By: sweetknights
Date Posted: 16 June 2011 at 12:51pm
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I told people quite early on with my last as I was so sick I don't think I could have hidden it with the second we waited until after the 12 week scan and with my first i told everyone pretty early on ------------- http://lilypie.com">  
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Posted By: kiwiking
Date Posted: 16 June 2011 at 1:14pm
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Thanks everyone for all your feedback. Went to the doctor today so that bit is all done.
Hanging out with a close friend on Sunday (going to the museum with her kids) and she will be the first I tell (but I want to tell so many others!) ------------- http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: AandCsmum
Date Posted: 16 June 2011 at 2:09pm
You should do some pretend gagging & see if she guesses 
I told family early on, after keeping the secret at work for so long it was actually weird having to tell them. ------------- Kel http://lilypie.com"> 
A = 01.02.04 & C = 16.01.09 & G = 30.03.12 |
Posted By: Bexee
Date Posted: 17 June 2011 at 8:54pm
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I had really bad MS with my first and ended up in hospital so we told people about 9 weeks. Had told parents before that.
Earlier this year I miscarried number 2 at 9.5 weeks. We had told some people but I'm glad we did. I needed the support and I'm pleased that people know that the baby existed. I think up until 12 weeks my theory is I only tell people who I would need for support if somehting goes wrong. |
Posted By: Cinderella
Date Posted: 18 June 2011 at 9:43am
Hey just noticed you have 4 boys. So do we. Have you been checking out all of the girlie stuff like I have? I have a big mouth. Have told a few people. |
rorylex wrote:Posted By: Guest_43647
Date Posted: 18 June 2011 at 12:27pm
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With our first we were so excited and told our parents straight a way but not anyone else. Then I had a bleed and a dr told us that my son was no viable and I would need a D&C. We had a week and a half of waiting as we flat out refused without further tests. Turns out he was VERY viable! During that week our family tried to help us through the situation there was a lot of "what happens is meant to be" and "it will be for the best". This didn't help and made my tummy turn. This was my first child and I was excited and hopeful and things were falling apart and that was all our parents could say.
From my experiences I would say there is no correct time. It is often suggested after the first trimester so you are over the time when something is most likely to go wrong, however, if you feel you can deal with or would even want people's support then tell people that you feel you would want to support you and that you can trust. There is no right or wrong answer just what suits you. |
Posted By: Flossie
Date Posted: 18 June 2011 at 2:57pm
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with both preganacies I have told close family and friends straight away as I would want them to know reguardless of what happens. Both times a few close people at work knew but kept it secret. 12 weeks told everyone else that didnt already know. ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: MrsMJD
Date Posted: 18 June 2011 at 7:11pm
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Hehe I'm a nurse and work for GP's kinda had to tell them early on cause they would have figured it out anyways. Plus I almost passed out in front of a patient lol.
Close friends we told early on, same with family. The extended family we didn't plan on telling till later but one of my grandfathers died when I was about 6 weeks and I told my Nanna who was so happy she told everyone! There is no right or worng time it's really a matter of what you are comfortable with and what support you feel you need. ------------- http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow">  
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Posted By: kelzie_rose
Date Posted: 24 June 2011 at 10:34am
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My folks, DH's folks, my two best mates and my small team at work got told as soon as I found out, as they were all super supportive through my three miscarriages (hard to hide miscarriages at work when you start bleeding badly and need to go home!) Also, as I found out that I was pregnant after being admitted to hospital with self-diagnosed appendicitis. (My appendix was fine!) -------------  Started TTC Apr 2008 With PCOS and a bicornuate uterus Our angel babies Jan 2010 <3 Oct 2010 <3 Apr 2011 <3 |
Posted By: Inkedpixie
Date Posted: 25 June 2011 at 6:19pm
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So far have told 2 friends, as they knew we were dealing with infertility issues, haven't told any other friends or family yet. Want to get a blood test next week to confirm and then will tell other friends. We will DF's sons in a couple of weeks - it's a bit tricky seeing as I teach at the school they attend so it'll be out in the open very quickly once they start sharing with friends, but I'd rather they know early rather than make them wait and possibly hear rumours through the school community (shockingly gossipy school).
It's nice to see I'm not the only person who struggles to keep it on the downlow till 12 weeks, don't know how people do it!
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Posted By: KC82
Date Posted: 27 June 2011 at 6:36pm
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I told my sisters and my Mum straight away, and my husband told one friend. We'll probably tell a couple of other friends at 10 weeks (cos we're going to Wellington and will see them there), and everyone else can wait til 12 or later. I sort of wish we hadn't told, as I'm so nervous, but I absolutely wanted my mum and sisters to know either way.
Fingers crossed I get to tell everyone else in a few weeks! |
Posted By: vixgirl
Date Posted: 06 July 2011 at 4:12pm
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Last time we told most people after my scan at 6 weeks, this time we haven't told many people (family and a few close friends) and won't do til next scan, I've had a bit of bleeding and cramping so just want to make sure all ok. It's hard not telling people, i can't believe some people tell no one til 12 weeks that must be sooo hard!! ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: buzylizy
Date Posted: 12 July 2011 at 12:40pm
| Ask yourself, if you had a mc who would do you want to know and who do you want as support....tell only those and do it whenever you want. |