TT advice for 3 1/2 yr old
Printed From: OHbaby!
Category: Have A Baby?
Forum Name: Toddler Times
Forum Description: Is bubs growing up and getting into everything? How do you train them to use the potty? When do you start feeding solids? Share your tips and advice here!
URL: https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=37631
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Topic: TT advice for 3 1/2 yr old
Posted By: lala76
Subject: TT advice for 3 1/2 yr old
Date Posted: 23 January 2011 at 1:38pm
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Hi, I need some advice on trying to toilet train my 3 1/2 year old. I feel like I've tried and failed at everything with her, sticker charts, rewards, lollies - nothing seems to motivate her. She gets very emotional about the toilet and being a big kid - and will just not do pee's or poo on it.
She talks about being a big kid but when it comes to wearing knickers she says she wants to be a baby and wear a nappy, have tried pull ups but she treats this like a nappy and just wets it. I have tried unsuccessfully to have her in knickers, she will hold onto all her bowel movements for up to 6 hours, we continually go into the toilet and she will sit on it, but once we come back out to the lounge she will wet her pants, we went through 6 days of this in a row and I gave up, do you think I'm giving up too soon? Has anyone else out there had a child this stubborn and was there anything you found helpful, there are things that she'll be missing out on soon as she will start kindy soon and they need to be potty trained (even this isn't motivation for her). Thanks, Angela |
Replies:
Posted By: kebakat
Date Posted: 23 January 2011 at 8:05pm
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Daniel is of a similar age and did the same thing.
The way we did it for wees is not everyones cuppatea but what I did was give him a drink of water, wait about an hour and get him to go sit on the toilet for wees. I knew he would need to go because of the big drink so I made him sit there until he did it. He tantrumed and kicked up a huge fuss BUT after about 50 mins (yes it took a long time) he finally did it. I made a massive deal about it. And then in a couple of hours I put him back on and repeated it. It took 20 mins. A couple of hours after that it took 1-2 mins. That seemed to fix the wees issue. Because all it is is that my child is stubborn and likes to be in control. Daycare have set times for kids that need reminding to go to the toilet so we have adopted those times (8,10,12,2,4 and before bed) so we don't get accidents. As for poos. Still haven't fixed that one. I can't use that same method for poos unfortunately |
Posted By: crafty1
Date Posted: 24 January 2011 at 3:08pm
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I also think that maybe you should have tried longer than six days. I've just toilet trained my boy and for the first 8-9 days it was accident every time but i just kept him in either undies or no pants, cleaned up a lot (played outside a lot too) and changed him umpteen times a day. Then miraculously he got it and started using the potty with big rewards and now 3 weeks later he is 100% at home and about 70% when we are out. Can you commit to just going for it and only using pull ups for nights? It is hard work but then it is done. ------------- http://lilypie.com">  
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Posted By: fire_engine
Date Posted: 24 January 2011 at 5:15pm
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Crafty1, have you tackled TTing for poos as well? Any tips? ------------- Mum to two wee boys |
Posted By: NovMum
Date Posted: 24 January 2011 at 7:30pm
Just my opinion too but I think 6 days isn't really long enough either, since its summer its a perfect time and yep you will have to clean up a fair bit but it shouldn't take too long, you really just need the first one so you can go mental on the congrats  ...
The way I was told to do it was to sit them on the potty or toilet while you run the bath at night, cause the water sound will often make them go and since its after dinner etc... Try this for a week to get them used to the idea, still wearing nappies so no pressure. Then go cold turkey, no pull ups etc except for sleep times... I had DD on the potty for awhile just to get her used to it and then she just decided one morning that nappies were for babies, we still had quiet a few accidents, its a year later and we still get the (very) odd accident. I just stayed home the first 2 days and then if we went anywhere else I took the potty for the next 3 and kept reminding/asking her if she needed to go... ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: lala76
Date Posted: 27 January 2011 at 1:33pm
Thank you so much for your replies, we are giving it another go and all nappies/pullups have been put away just for night time, I will try for much longer - it's hard when you get it in your ear from people about how quick their child was to potty train and I've just taken too much of it to heart, fingers crossed
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Posted By: Chickaboo
Date Posted: 28 January 2011 at 10:19pm
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I don;t have alot of advise - although I have tried everything I am sure I am an expert - my son not long turned 4 and he still has a few accidents and poo's he will do a few 'skiddie' before we get him to do them on the toilet.
Its fustrating cause we know he can do it! Wee's remindign him like Kebakat said did work - but now it doesnt it really fustrates him if we keep telling him to go - he wants to go when no one tells him to but he still has accidents.... Trouble is with our boy is he is very stubborn - knows his own mind and it has/had become a power struggle between us - his 3 year ol year was a hard one because of the constant battle of TT - once we took the presure off his behaviour was much better... We are getting there though - he is in Undies all the time (except for nights where he has requested to sleep in undies but I won;t let him as he is always wet by morning) Good luck and if she really doesnt have any interest at all then I wouldnt push it as it may make her be more stubborn about it. ------------- http://lilypie.com">  
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Posted By: MuppetsMama
Date Posted: 29 January 2011 at 8:58am
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***Sometimes*** they get to the point where they are actually being naughty about it all. if they know and understand what they are meant to be doing but just flat out refuse (not because they are scared of going, but just being naughty) up to you whether you discipline them for this, and how you do it. Ok I'll leave that there now you probably all think I'm really weird...
on another note, do you have an ipod touch or iphone?? I have an app called Potty Predictor (I think it was about $2), and it's great! you put in when they have a drink, and it sends you a cute little alarm later (at a time you set, say 20mins for example) for them to try going to the toilet. you can also put it tries, wees, poos and accidents. If they do a wee or poo on the toilet/potty it goes, "Way to Go!!" and opens up a little sticker book where they choose a sticker and put it on the scene. Might be worth a shot, just for something a bit different...the novelty of it is quite cool for toddlers. mind you, if you don't have an ipod/iphone, this is all kind of irrelevant!!
Good luck! |
Posted By: lala76
Date Posted: 29 January 2011 at 2:06pm
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We have made AMAZING progress, I've taken the stubborn approach myself and know that she understands but was just being pure stubborn - the first day I re-tried we had accidents all day long, second day only a couple of accidents and was taking her to the toilet every 30 mins, 3rd day and she's been taking herself to the toilet when she needs to and no accidents yet.
She was playing up and whinging that she didn't want to go to the toilet in those 2 days so I left her sitting on the toilet to do her business and walked off - perhaps she found that since I wasn't there to whinge at and cry too there was no point in making a big deal about it. I can see the light at the end of the tunnel although I know it's early days, is just such a neat feeling for me that she can do it and it was me and my reacting to her emotions that was probably the problem.
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