Discipline
Printed From: OHbaby!
Category: Have A Baby?
Forum Name: Toddler Times
Forum Description: Is bubs growing up and getting into everything? How do you train them to use the potty? When do you start feeding solids? Share your tips and advice here!
URL: https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=33110
Printed Date: 06 August 2025 at 6:24pm
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Topic: Discipline
Posted By: kiwikid
Subject: Discipline
Date Posted: 27 April 2010 at 8:41am
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DS is nearing 2yrs and the good old 'dont touch' etc techniques are just not cutting it anymore. I've found myself smacking his hand a couple of times this week after 3 or 4 warnings not to do something by which time I fairly riled as of course in typical toddler fashion warnings apparently make him want to do it more and with that devilish look in his eye as he tests his boundaries.
I know I need to come up with a better, more effective system for disciplining him and would really appreciate advice on how you do things in your household and if you have any books on the subject you'd recommend. I dont have an issue with the everyday stuff like wanting something he cant have etc etc but the big stuff like throwing dirt / sand at people or pinching I just cant seem to get through to him with getting down to his level and explaining why we dont do this sort of thing, he just ignores me and does it more and I get frustrated and things escalate which I'm not happy with (not happy with my actions that is), any advice is appreciated - I'm very sure I'm not the first mother to an an active 21mth old to be feeling this way!!!! ------------- 
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Replies:
Posted By: cuppatea
Date Posted: 27 April 2010 at 9:04am
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Time out. My 15 month old does it so it's not beyond their grasp at that age. My eldest was doing timeout before 21 months as well. Just keep it for the big things, hitting, throwing etc so it doesn't lose it's effect and be aware that at first it will be less of a punishment and more teaching him to stay in timeout. So you may have to put him back in 15 thousand times before he stays. We have started with both boys by doing it by getting them to stay for a few seconds, then doing the apology etc and then working up the amount of time they stay. At 15 months my son never stays for 1 min, only about 20 secs before I get him out but he will work up to the min and mr nearly 3 does a full 2 mins for his crimes.
I can put them in to timeout anywhere, so it works well for sand throwing etc. ------------- 
 
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Posted By: kebakat
Date Posted: 27 April 2010 at 9:16am
| I was gonna say timeout too. We have used timeout once in the last 4 or 5 months. So we very rarely use it but he sure knows hes done bad when it does happen since we use it so rarely |
Posted By: gypsynita
Date Posted: 27 April 2010 at 9:38am
i don't have any advice but didn't want to read and run  we've got the same problem and nothing (even time outs) seems to work... ------------- Anita Mum to Cian (Aug 08), Josh (Jun 10) http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: kiwisj
Date Posted: 28 April 2010 at 12:11am
I would try time out too. Callum had his first one last week (he's 16m) as he was constantly pulling my hair and I could tell he knew what I was saying when I told him gentle and NO. He sat for about 30 seconds, I was impressed he seemed to "get it" that I meant business and I got a big hug afterwards and then we carried on with something different. At C's age it's more of a last resort/way to break out of the "one more time for a better reaction" thing. But with kids I've nannied for in the past timeout is definitely an option by 2yo 
active boys can be so frustrating and exhausting!------------- SJ Callum - Dec 2008 Daniel - Oct 2010 |
Posted By: fire_engine
Date Posted: 28 April 2010 at 9:00am
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We're time outers as well. Dan goes through phases where he's in it most days for about 5 days (less each day) and then gets that I'm serious so we don't need it again for a while. It's for things like sitting on my head or playing with the heater. I don't tend to use it for more than about 2 things at a time (partly for my sanity). It quickly becomes a way to stop behaviour escalating -
Me: "do you want to go in time out? Cos you will if you keep doing x". Dan: "No". *bashful look, stops what he's doing* For Dan, he really thrives on attention and being around us, so a quick removal from that situation is quite powerful. He's only in TO for about 30 seconds. I also sometimes forcefully remove him from a situation - e.g. if he keeps playing with the CD player, I'll pick him up quite firmly, carry him to the other side of the room and put him down firmly again and tell him off, or if he's a PITA bugging me, I'll remove him. I found the Dianne Levy book about Time Out for toddlers through teenagers to be really helpful. ------------- Mum to two wee boys |
Posted By: Babe
Date Posted: 28 April 2010 at 2:54pm
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Yeah I was gonna suggest a Diane Levy book too - Yes I love you, now go to your room. We've found the Ask, Tell, Act trio works a treat! -------------   
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Posted By: Natalie_G
Date Posted: 28 April 2010 at 9:02pm
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This is a good thread for the Time Out discipline. when is a good time to start it.
Arianne just takes what she wants and does dangerous things like climbing on unstable things and she doesnt listen to me. Would it be a good idea to start timeout? ------------- http://lilypie.com">  
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Posted By: whitewave
Date Posted: 28 April 2010 at 10:04pm
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We have the same problem, but at Campbell's age, he just thinks its all a game! Too soon for time out? I find for minor things I'll just distract him, but if he's trying to hit me with something or hurting the cat, then I'll say "no" firmly and quickly take either the offending weapon away, or him away from the cat.
Might have to find one of those books next time I'm at the library! |
Posted By: Shezamumof3
Date Posted: 28 April 2010 at 10:38pm
This is what I do as well, if I have said no a few times or told him not to do something and he doesnt listen and Im at the end of my tether, then he gets picked up firmly taken to his room and plonked in his cot with a NO! and THEN he knows he has been naughty. ------------- |
Flissty wrote: