Toileting issues with Miss Five
Printed From: OHbaby!
Category: Have A Baby?
Forum Name: Kindy and Beyond
Forum Description: So you've survived the sleepless nights and toddler tantrums, now the fun really begins! Talk to other parents of older children here!
URL: https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=24594
Printed Date: 07 July 2025 at 5:08pm
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Topic: Toileting issues with Miss Five
Posted By: Maya
Subject: Toileting issues with Miss Five
Date Posted: 16 February 2009 at 1:00pm
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It's not so much a toilet training problem, she's been out of nappies since she was 22 mths, but I really do wonder some days if I should put her back in them!
The problem is, she holds on until she is absolutely busting and then rushes to the toilet in a panic. She has usually already 'leaked' a bit in her knickers by this stage, and as a result she has thrush. I get annoyed with her coz she must *know* she needs to go much earlier, so I don't understand why she doesn't just go when she first needs to. For example, last week we went to athletics, which is about 5 mins drive up the road. We arrived, she played in the playground for a few mins then said she was busting to go to the toilet. She took off to go to the toilet but the back of her shorts was already noticeably wet by this stage so she had obviously been holding it for ages. Why on earth didn't she go before we left home? In order to have been that desperate, she must have been needing to go before we even left. Sometimes I think she gets too engrossed in what she's doing and doesn't want to take time out to go to the toilet, but she's nearly six, she should know better! I am so frustrated! I've tried making her go to the toilet every 1/2 hour or so but she just gets cross and argues with me about it. And I make her change her knickers if I notice they're wet, but most of the time I don't notice till I get them in the wash or she starts complaining about her girly bits being sore. Can anyone offer any words of wisdom? Aside from it making her sore, it also smells and I don't want her to get teased at school for being smelly! -------------  Maya Grace (28/02/03)
 (02/01/06)
The Gremlins:Sienna Marie & Mercedes Kailah (14/10/06)
Lil miss:Chiara Louise Chloe (09/07/08)
Her ladyship:Rosalia Sophie Anais (18/06/12)
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Replies:
Posted By: Snappy
Date Posted: 16 February 2009 at 1:09pm
Janaya is exactly the same, more so with number twos. Yesterday she came running inside, pulled down her knickers and a poo dropped on the floor  Janaya is known for holding and squeezing in her number twos until she gets constipated.
Yesterday she also had a small smear of poos in her knickers and decided she would place them in the bucket in the laundry herself, and she must have had poo on her foot and got it all through the house. As you can tell I am at the end of my tether with it all. I really dont have any advice, just wanted to say I am in the same boat and share your frustrations. I hope someone can shed some light on this! ------------- Mummy to two beauties... Formerly Kaiz. |
Posted By: LenaJudson
Date Posted: 16 February 2009 at 1:30pm
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I had TT probs with my one and everyone said "this works, that works" and nothing worked! Just took time.
but my 2CW.... With Maya being 5 (nearly 6!) would a sticker chart help? seeing as she is TT she is just making life difficult!! - eg if knickers are dry and not smelly when she gets home from school a sticker, if she goes to the park and comes back dry / goes to the toilet without busting a sticker etc etc. Maybe instead of every half hour try and monitor when she has a drink and ask her to go toilet straight after, she has to go before you leave the house etc... associate it with things as part of her every day "life" as opposed to every half hour? I hope my ramble makes sense!! And GOOD LUCK! It must be frustrating for ya ... i am out of ideas ... ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: caitlynsmygirl
Date Posted: 16 February 2009 at 7:59pm
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Cailtyn had problems with number 2s (the problem was that she did them in her knickers, ALL THE TIME )
I saw many people about it , GPs, Paediatricians etc etc, a child psychologist . The child psychologist told me that basically , her bum, wasnt telling her head , that she needed to go, it wasn't deliberate. Maya (and Janaya ) could have the same thing or similar. With Caitlyn I decided to get tough, and made a starchart , if she went 4 weeks without going in her underpants then she could go camping, if she did go in underpants , she couldn't. Shes now been doing them on the toilet for 2 months, (im very proud ) and none in her knickers. If Maya is getting caught short for similar reasons ,then id just remind her (or better yet, tell her ) to go , even if she says she doesnt need to , tell her she needs to try for a few minutes . ------------- 
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Posted By: AandCsmum
Date Posted: 16 February 2009 at 9:01pm
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Honestly girls can be gross lol....Alia has issues with wiping & flushing the toliet!
I find that it's just constant reminder, they are so busy & so engrossed in what they do. I follow Alia to the toliet as make sure she wipes, flushes & washes her hands! As soon as I spot her wiggling, I ask her if she wants to go, sometimes she does some times she doesn't. We had the same thing the other day, we'd got some place & then 5 mins later she wanted the loo, when we were miles past the loo as well! I thought I must make her go before we leave the house. I remember my Mum making us go before we went out. ------------- Kel http://lilypie.com"> 
A = 01.02.04 & C = 16.01.09 & G = 30.03.12 |
Posted By: mum2paris
Date Posted: 17 February 2009 at 12:16am
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Same here. last year we had alot of probs with the toilet once she started school - she had been great till then, however toilet block was so far away from her class she'd forget to go.
we put back in place the calendar thing that we'd done when she was little and toilet training (at that stage it was incentives, to go 7days dry, then 2 weeks etc), she gets a sticker on her calendar when she's had a dry day. it helped us to keep track and seriously sometimes there was patterns, like mostly over weekends it would be ok, but mondays were usually bad. fridays not so bad as she'd already had enough wets during the week to obviously have some memory of "ooh i better make sure i go at playlunch etc" i have taught her to go at the start of play and lunch after eating so that she at least knows she's gone, or if she forgets that, to go when the 1st bell rings as that means she's got 5 mins until the finall bell rings for her to be back in class. giving them set times helps too i think because sometimes their body learns to expect to go at that time after a while. Over the school holidays it improved dramatically after the first month or so. but then, she sometimes gets grumpy with us as we have an insistence that before we go out the girls both go to the toilet. that helps hugely, other times we still get somewhere and we're like "seriously, you just went!!!" i think it tends to be a habit of wanting to go at the warehouse or farmers... i don't mind though cos usually means at least we get thru until we get back home again. we sometimes have troubles with miss 3 and her insistence that she doesn't need to go to which she gets the "well, just have a try for me then" but miss 5 has started getting really good and mostly is all good with just going before we go out alot of the time nowif we say we're going somewhere she's the first one on the toilet and shoes on ready to go, which leaves more time for the more stubborn member of our household. seriously though - we still have times where we have troubles with wiping, and with hygiene, like for the longest times she'd come home from school with wet pants or wet undies and not have changed them, or we'd go to change her at bedtime into jammies and find wet underwear only for her to tell us she'd done that at school or earlier in the day. god i shouldn't talk too soon, but so far, we are doing well. January was her first totally dry month in well, pretty much ever. She got the hugest sticker on her calendar on the last day of the month and she's now determined to get a huge sticker for this month too. hang in there. it's not fun but well, should get better - however frustrating it is.... the way i see it is this - do we still wet our pants...? (ok don't answer that but point made hopefully!) i know the frustration though. good luck guys. ------------- Janine and her 2 cool chicks, Paris & Ayja 
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Posted By: caitlynsmygirl
Date Posted: 17 February 2009 at 12:19am
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This is neither here nor there , but I just wanted to say that in a week and four days, the Miss Five of this threads title will be miss SIX.
Feel old Em ?  -------------
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Posted By: mum2paris
Date Posted: 17 February 2009 at 12:43am
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funny aye.... the leader of the pack here Emma..... Miss maya was just a teeny when this site started... now all the big kids are just getting older (and bossier!!) ------------- Janine and her 2 cool chicks, Paris & Ayja
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Posted By: caitlynsmygirl
Date Posted: 17 February 2009 at 9:33am
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bossier? ha understatement of the year !
and just to scare you Janine....next year Ayja you'll have 2 school kids (I think , maths not my strong point ) .... scary huh ? hehe  -------------
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Posted By: mum2paris
Date Posted: 17 February 2009 at 7:27pm
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oh yes we already have figured that one out lol. She's grown a little in the last few months and is looking very grown up. scaring the heck out of me. ------------- Janine and her 2 cool chicks, Paris & Ayja
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Posted By: kezplanet
Date Posted: 17 February 2009 at 7:28pm
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I am having the same trouble with Ashlyn at the moment, I know when she is getting sick she gets slack and forgetful but she is going to be starting shool in about 6 weeks and there is a lot happening between now and then so I will be trying to "help" her with the star/sticker chart to see if this has a positive impact with her, may also have a talk to kindy about 'reminding' her to go while she is there. ------------- Kerryn, Mum to Ashlyn(29/3/04), Anastasia(1/11/05) & Abigail (24/02/09) |
Posted By: caitlynsmygirl
Date Posted: 17 February 2009 at 7:42pm
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I love star charts, giving them something to work towards, works very well.
In fact , I want to give myself a starchart ....not sure what for tho .... -------------
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Posted By: kezplanet
Date Posted: 17 February 2009 at 7:51pm
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making it thru the next week and 4 days without loosing the plot? ------------- Kerryn, Mum to Ashlyn(29/3/04), Anastasia(1/11/05) & Abigail (24/02/09) |
Posted By: Maya
Date Posted: 18 February 2009 at 7:41pm
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So maybe a star chart is the way to go. My boss has this really cool one with her daughters name on it and sparkly stars, I must ask her where it came from. It's really good to know that I'm not the only one tho, and I guess at least it's just wees she has issues with coz cleaning wet undies is much easier than dirty ones .
And yep, the leader of the pack. She's kind of like the OHbaby! yardstick coz I joined here when she was 7 mths old and the site was brand new, then started working here in Oct '04 and she's pretty much grown up with OHbaby! I can't believe she's nearly six. And I can't believe that Ayja is starting school next year  That's just so wrong! She's still tiny... isn't she?
And Kelly, don't you be forgetting that I might be older than you, but Caitlyn will always be older than Maya..... 
------------- Maya Grace (28/02/03)
(02/01/06)
The Gremlins:Sienna Marie & Mercedes Kailah (14/10/06)
Lil miss:Chiara Louise Chloe (09/07/08)
Her ladyship:Rosalia Sophie Anais (18/06/12)
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Posted By: mum2paris
Date Posted: 18 February 2009 at 7:48pm
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, hahaha Emma i was just going to write the same about Caitlyn being older.
lol, it's so funny aye, I signed up the night beofre i had Paris and came back when Paris was about 8 or 9 months i think... freaks me out to think that all the small group of people that were around back then have really gone off separate ways, popping back in every once in a while.... pppft, gosh i think when i joint there were like maybe 12 active topics at that time when i first posted in the forum. and yes, Ayja is still small. but acting older. freeeeks me out. ------------- Janine and her 2 cool chicks, Paris & Ayja
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Posted By: .Mel
Date Posted: 18 February 2009 at 8:29pm
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My only suggestion would be to remind her before you leave the house to go to the toilet and stand over her while she goes...
I wonder if it is a head/bladder thing, the two not communicating.... have you had it checked? Does she get UTI's? ------------- Mr Mellow (16) Miss Attitude (8) Destructa Kid (3) 
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Posted By: Maya
Date Posted: 18 February 2009 at 8:35pm
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I did think about getting it checked, but I'm procrastinating in a bad mummy kinda way. I have a problem with my bladder/kidney which my mum always said was *caused* by me doing the exact same thing as Maya does - holding on too long - but with Sienna's kidney issues my specialist thinks there could be a link. I didn't start getting UTIs till I was 11 but they've been pretty constant ever since.
I did say to my sister today tho that I'll take her and get her checked out. It's just hard coz I don't want to make her feel embarrassed about it etc. coz that might make it worse and telling the doctor all about it probably will embarrass her. ------------- Maya Grace (28/02/03)
(02/01/06)
The Gremlins:Sienna Marie & Mercedes Kailah (14/10/06)
Lil miss:Chiara Louise Chloe (09/07/08)
Her ladyship:Rosalia Sophie Anais (18/06/12)
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Posted By: .Mel
Date Posted: 18 February 2009 at 8:38pm
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Yeah I can understand that. Surely wetting her pants is more embarassing and I'm pretty sure she would like the problem fixed. Maybe make it a Mummy/Maya morning, take her to breakfast then to the doctors... explain to her why she's going and that you are wanting to get it fixed......so she doesn't have wet knickers all the time.. ------------- Mr Mellow (16) Miss Attitude (8) Destructa Kid (3)
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Posted By: Maya
Date Posted: 18 February 2009 at 9:04pm
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Good thinking. Ta!
I just remember being mortified coz when I had UTIs when I was younger I would sometimes wet myself and I was really self conscious about it. ------------- Maya Grace (28/02/03)
(02/01/06)
The Gremlins:Sienna Marie & Mercedes Kailah (14/10/06)
Lil miss:Chiara Louise Chloe (09/07/08)
Her ladyship:Rosalia Sophie Anais (18/06/12)
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Posted By: caitlynsmygirl
Date Posted: 18 February 2009 at 10:38pm
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"And Kelly, don't you be forgetting that I might be older than you, but Caitlyn will always be older than Maya..... "
*cries * I agree with Mel about the head and bladder thing , that sounds similar to what Caitlyn had , only it was the tummy and head not working together . haha Kerryn , that sounds like a good reason for a starchart ! im losing it already ! -------------
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