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This has been really bugging me

Printed From: OHbaby!
Category: Have A Baby?
Forum Name: Toddler Times
Forum Description: Is bubs growing up and getting into everything? How do you train them to use the potty? When do you start feeding solids? Share your tips and advice here!
URL: https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=17039
Printed Date: 22 July 2025 at 1:07pm
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Topic: This has been really bugging me
Posted By: turk13
Subject: This has been really bugging me
Date Posted: 08 May 2008 at 1:00pm
My best mate and her boys, 2 and a bit, and a 3 month old baby were at my place the other day.
I was walking into the lounge as my son was yelling at my friend, "look what he's doing"... her 2yo had a cricket bat, which was taller than himself and he was pushing it down on bub'z forhead, while he was having bum time on the floor!!!! ( i kinda screamed a wee bit in panic) but mum just went over and took the bat off him and said what do you think your doing?? i'm glad i stopped that when i did. and left it at that. OMG- if that was my child (i'm not a smacker, but i would have!!)
I just couldnt believe it. Now when i think about it (ok maybe im bein a drama queen) but what if he went about it swinging the bat instead?? bub's could have been SERIOUSLY injured.
How would you have gone about this if it was your kids? and as a friend would you have told your mate what you thought about it? (or do i just need to get a life and worry about my own stuff?)



Replies:
Posted By: Jay_R
Date Posted: 08 May 2008 at 1:12pm
Yeah, its a bit of a tough one, but I think in circumstances such as that we all react in our own way. It might be that Master 2 has been a bit jealous of baby, and your friend is trying to combat that by staying calm when he gets a bit feral with the baby.



Posted By: nikkitheknitter
Date Posted: 08 May 2008 at 1:53pm
I don't know - it is a hard one. I don't believe in smacking children - especially when it is in relation to violence (treating violence with violence? tad contradictory) but I probably would have given my daughter a serious talking to.

Eeeek... I thought it was your baby you were talking about!!

Now I'm on track:

I think at 2 years old there is a lot of experimenting going on... especially with reactions etc and if she wasn't worried about it then I wouldn't be. Attention seeking behaviour from a 2 year old is VERY common and IMO I think the best way to deal with it is to ignore it.


Posted By: caraMel
Date Posted: 08 May 2008 at 2:18pm
I agree with Nikki.
I would have been horrified to see it too, but as it is someone else's child you can't really comment on the way she chooses to deal with it.
I know when Benjy was born, Ella used to get frustrated that he couldn't play with her properly and she'd do all kinds of wacky/scary things to him partially I think out of finding him so boring and disappointing to what she had hoped for in a brother and partially because she was bigger and had the power to do that to him. The best way we found to deal with it was redirection. Getting her to read to him or make faces at him or sing him songs to see if she could make him smile. Or worst case scenario, if she'd done something particularly dangerous or rough like your friend's son, time out to think about it.

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Mel, Mummy to E: 6, B: 4 and:



Posted By: Kellz
Date Posted: 08 May 2008 at 2:45pm
Who's cricket bat was it?!! Doesnt sound like a toy kids should be playing with!


Posted By: Maya
Date Posted: 08 May 2008 at 2:52pm
Originally posted by Kellz Kellz wrote:

Who's cricket bat was it?!! Doesnt sound like a toy kids should be playing with!


I'll say!

In our house when the girls do something dangerous or that is hurting each other (and the gremlins are masters at devising new ways to torture each other) I just take their hand and look at them in the face and say "stop, that is NOT okay" then try and distract them, and I'd probably have done that in the situation you described.

But then again I have no intentions of leaving a cricket bat around for the gremlins to find once baby is born...

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Maya Grace (28/02/03)
(02/01/06)
The Gremlins:Sienna Marie & Mercedes Kailah (14/10/06)
Lil miss:Chiara Louise Chloe (09/07/08)
Her ladyship:Rosalia Sophie Anais (18/06/12)


Posted By: Andie
Date Posted: 08 May 2008 at 2:54pm

My gosh I can just imagine the havoc Ella would create if she got her hands on a cricket bat!      I know kids hunt these things out, but you kinda have to expect trouble when you combine a toddler and a cricket bat! 

I think I'd have got a shock too, to see him doing that to his wee sibling, but remember that their mum might have seen this sort of thing before and worked out the best way to deal with it for her family.  I've noticed that parents with 2 kids seem to have quite a different approach to some things than parents of 1, and maybe we're only in a position to say what we'd have done if we've also got or had a baby and a toddler together.  Just my 2 cents.   



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Andie


Posted By: turk13
Date Posted: 08 May 2008 at 4:09pm
oh bless you all, your so level headed...lol..
i just saw it and yeah.. was totally horrified. The wee man had my eldest sons cricket bat out of the sports box, which his mum was fine about.
he does show that he's frustrated, alot!
I know of a couple of kids at play group, and my youngest son also, who dont want to play with him as he's a hitter, scratcher and biter.... but as we keep reassuring his mum... it's only a phase...lol.


Posted By: Roksana
Date Posted: 09 May 2008 at 12:00pm
Hmmm...a hard one. But yes I agree with Nikki, 2 year olds (like my little monkey) like to do things to attract attention and some times it is best to ignore it. But personally after this bub is born I will keep all sharp objects and toys that could hurt away so that there is no way Zaara could intentionally or not hurt bub.

So far Zaara has shown her gentle nature around other babies so I am hoping this will never happen to us.

I dont hit Zaara either but put her in the corner after she has been warned not to do some thing twice.

But yes I would have freaked out just like you did!!

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http://lilypie.com">
http://lilypie.com">


Posted By: nikkitheknitter
Date Posted: 09 May 2008 at 3:29pm
Ahhh they grow out of it... and then the littler ones get their own back!! ha.

Hannah used to be a biter... now she gets harassed by younger kids. Karma I tell ya.


Posted By: AnnC
Date Posted: 09 May 2008 at 4:08pm
Originally posted by Kellz Kellz wrote:

Who's cricket bat was it?!! Doesnt sound like a toy kids should be playing with!


LOL Rhyley has a cricket bat toy (and the ball to go with it!) But he fair swings it so watch out if you are near him - he has taken to hitting the ball (on the ground) in the kitchen which is good. So I wouldn't call someone for having a cricket bat as a toy...Its one of Rhyley's favourites!

BUT i think it should be supervised if they had it and was playing with it. Rhyley's is up high when hes not playing with it and can only get it if he asks for it.

As for what happens - it seems a totally innoncent thing (no matter how dangereous is could of been ) a 2 year old does not understand 'outcomes' if I hit this baby on the head really hard I can kill it - IYGWIM...
As someone said if the mother wasn't stressed about it you need not be as well. Only if it happens way too often.

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Ann


Also Mum to Josh (15) and Brooke (10)


Posted By: Kellz
Date Posted: 09 May 2008 at 4:50pm
The first post didnt say that it was a TOY cricket bat! I have a girl so only know about dolls and stuff!


Posted By: AnnC
Date Posted: 09 May 2008 at 6:18pm
Perhaps Turk13 should of moved this away from little hands to avoid the situation but unless you are thinking like a parent of a toddler/walk about then sometimes you can not think about things like that.

LOL Girls can play cricket too you know Kellz



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Ann


Also Mum to Josh (15) and Brooke (10)


Posted By: Maya
Date Posted: 09 May 2008 at 7:32pm
Originally posted by nikkiwhyte nikkiwhyte wrote:

Ahhh they grow out of it... and then the littler ones get their own back!! ha.

Hannah used to be a biter... now she gets harassed by younger kids. Karma I tell ya.


LOL - definitely true in our house! Mercedes was always the bully, even in utero she was dominant, but a couple of months ago Sienna decided to fight back and now she is in charge, poor Mercedes!

-------------
Maya Grace (28/02/03)
(02/01/06)
The Gremlins:Sienna Marie & Mercedes Kailah (14/10/06)
Lil miss:Chiara Louise Chloe (09/07/08)
Her ladyship:Rosalia Sophie Anais (18/06/12)



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