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Vanessa104679 
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Joined: 30 January 2013
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 Topic: Young and pregnant (20/21)?
Posted: 31 January 2013 at 6:06pm |
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I am 21, and my partner is 20. We were using contraception, but conceived regardless. Our experience has been a bit overwhelming, from terror and family feuds to excitement. Is anyone else in the same boat, or have you been in the past? Otherwise, what advice would you give to young(er) parents?
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Rexy
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Joined: 28 February 2012
Location: Hastings
Points: 216
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Posted: 01 February 2013 at 12:20pm |
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Hiya, first up, congrats :) I was 21 when I got pregnant, though my partner was 31. I'm 22 now with a gorgeous 4 month old daughter. It can be hard, being a youngish mum, but no matter what age you are, people are always going to have something to say. All you can do is smile and nod, then do what you believe is right.
My experience was that I lost some friends, but I found out who really matters. See if you can find a group of mums in your area, and join a group of mums due at the same time. I love my September group :) There's dads groups around too, that your partner could join. I know Family Start and plunket have Dads groups. Antenatal classes are good for meeting other mums and dads to be too.
Find out what you are entitled to, with working for families, and paid parental leave if you are working, or the parental tax credit if you're not. It's a huge help for when you are at home with baby.
Just trying to think of what else I can say! um, most important thing is to relax and enjoy your pregnancy and baby, you will learn everything as you go along.
Feel free to message me if you want :)
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kalika
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Joined: 08 September 2012
Location: Canterbury
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Posted: 03 February 2013 at 7:30pm |
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My best friend had her first at 21. I haven't specifically asked her how she found it (she lived 4 hours away from me and then I went on an OE for 18 months) but I think you need to surround yourself with supportive people. The other people may come and go but as Rexy said the ones who matter will stick by you.l
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Mummabear16
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Joined: 17 January 2013
Location: Wellington
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Posted: 04 February 2013 at 8:05am |
I'm pretty much in the same boat! Me and my fiance are both 22 and are expecting our first child in September. It definitely was a shock at first but now we couldn't be more excited :) Same situation when we told our parents, they would of preferred us to be married first! Haha but then they got their heads around it and they're totally excited for us now. Vanessa104679, as long as you and your partner are both 100% ready for this, you guys will be great parents  Feel free to add or message me if you want to talk more! :)
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Anxious New Mum
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Joined: 31 July 2012
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Posted: 04 February 2013 at 12:30pm |
Hi there, I saw your post and thought I would add my 2cents  My partner and I are 22 and were not married or engaged but weve been together for 6 years in March. Obviously with our fair share of ups and downs. In 2011 we fell pregnant even though I was on contraception which was a huge shock and very scary but we decided we would keep it. Unfortunately I miscarried before 12 weeks. Which broke our hearts, it took us (especially me) a while to get over through it. But after losing that baby we realised just how much we truly wanted to be parents and so after about 12months we decided to plan and try for a baby. Alot of our friends thought we were crazy and couldnt understand why we would want to so young but we knew that we were ready and we were in a good place both mentally and financially. Luckily our families have been super supportive all the way. Im now 36 weeks pregnant with our little girl and we cannot wait to finally meet her I honestly can say that you need to follow your heart and do what you think is best for you and your baby. Make a plan. Get support, from friends, family, doctors, community. Theres so much support out there you've just got to ask. Its amazing how much support you get from other mums. Theyre so supportive because they truly know how difficult it can be. Anyway sorry about the rant. Hope that helps a little.
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Guest_47917
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Joined: 05 December 2012
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Posted: 05 February 2013 at 10:58am |
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hey, im 21 and 35 weeks pegnant with my second child,was 20 when i had my first, there are alot of support networks out there for young mothers, i think the hardest thing is the looks you get from older people.
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Anoushkajayne
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Posted: 21 February 2013 at 1:11pm |
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I'm the same! I'm 21 (22 this year) and my partner is 23. I'm due in September :) it definitely wasn't planned but were happy about our decision now. My parents took it really well which was a big shock to me but nice to hear that they were gonna support my decision. I'm 11 weeks now and very happy :)
Have you guys organised your midwives yet? I'm in central Auckland and are currently on a midwife hunt but does anyone have any recommendations?
Xx
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twinkletoes
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Joined: 02 April 2007
Location: Auckland, NZ
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Posted: 06 March 2013 at 9:46am |
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Hi Girls, I had a baby last year and was a geriatric pregnancy. Came on here as my Step daughter is 19 and expecting in May this year. (Trying to find some threads that she may fit into and get some support in) Anoushka if you are still looking for a midwife, I highly recommend Wendy Sigvertsen, she works out of Epsom midwives and also Quay Med in the central City Wendy Sigvertsen
Tel: 09- 624 2447
Mob: 027 239 6323
Fax: 09- 624 2062
wendy@epsommidwives.co.nz
My SD is under her care now and loves her.
I'll leave you all now and hope you all have great pregnancy's and all the best with motherhood! Enjoy the sleep whilst you can get it girls.
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Mrs-F
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Joined: 18 January 2013
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Posted: 06 March 2013 at 10:41am |
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Im 21 and due 1st November .... Our first baby and Was a planned pregnancy, we got married in December so decided a family is what we both wanted..
I have my dating scan next friday - Im so excited :)
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Guest_47917
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Posted: 06 March 2013 at 11:41am |
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my second one is now due in a week, im 21 with a 19 month old daughter, really excited about my impending birth, everyday im looking for signs that hes going to come
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sophieparrant
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Joined: 01 April 2013
Location: Wellington
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Posted: 02 April 2013 at 11:38am |
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Hi, im about to turn 21 and am pregnant with my first. If any other youngish mothers in Wellington would like to form a coffee group or something where we can all get together that would be cool? Also if anyone has any information on picking midwives?? I want to pick someone im going to feel so comfortable with.
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ALittleLoopy
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Posted: 04 April 2013 at 9:38am |
I fell pregnant at 21 (almost 22) with DD whos now 2.5. We were married at 19 and had been together 5 years before trying for a baby (married 2 yrs)... the hardest thing is def other peoples glares, i even got that from college girls and older mums WITH a wedding ring on, but you cant change how other people persieve a younger mum.
I say if you guys are happy and ready for this baby emotionally and financially then go for is and screw what everyone else thinks...iv just turned 24 and about to start TTC #2 and i still worry occasionally how itll be with me walking around with a toddler and i big belly and the looks i might get but then i just tell myself, its none of their dammed business and walk on.
best of luck to you,def find some form of support if its not there with family as a lack of support may lead to PND, it did for me as i lost almost all of my friends since they were all at uni and partying still.
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Mummabear16
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Joined: 17 January 2013
Location: Wellington
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Posted: 04 April 2013 at 11:49am |
sophiejparrant, I'm 22 and pregnant with #1 :) I'm moving down to Wellington after baby is here (September) and would totally be keen for a coffee group! I won't know anyone other then my fiance so I'd love to meet other youngish mums Where abouts in Wellington are you?
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sophieparrant
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Posted: 05 April 2013 at 4:10pm |
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MummyToBe, i am in Petone so around 10mins drive from the city. We really love it in the Hutt, where abouts are you guys planning to move to? You getting excited. I am very keen to meet up once your down here. All my friends aren't really 'baby- friendly' friends Haha So will be lovely to meet someone in the same boat.
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Emma-Louise23
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Posted: 20 May 2013 at 2:11pm |
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Hi ladies
I just moved to Wellington from Tauranga. I'm 23 due in September with my first and would love to share pregnancy and motherhood with some new friends.
Emma :)
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Mummabear16
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Location: Wellington
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Posted: 20 May 2013 at 10:28pm |
The fiance just found us a place last week! It's in Totara Park in Upper Hutt, close to Trentham where his work will be moving to. So stoked that he's found a place but now I'm dying to actually see it! The pictures on Trademe are just of the outside :/ lol. Will be super keen to meet up anywhere though for a coffee group or just a general catch up with anyone really
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escadachic
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Posted: 23 May 2013 at 4:03pm |
Emma, if you want to join the coffee group, you are more then welcome. Here's the link: Wellington Coffee Group
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rbree45
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Posted: 18 November 2013 at 8:43pm |
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Hi I'm 21 next month and 16 weeks pregnant. Looking for any younger mums in the Auckland area to chat to or start a coffee group?
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Young and pregnant (20/21)?
Sept '12
