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Andie
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Topic: old enough for a sticker chart? Posted: 30 July 2008 at 2:08pm |
Hi - I'd love to know at what age your kids started to respond well to sticker charts. We have eating issues here, and have done from day 1. They used to be extreme and looking back I can see the mistakes that I made that led to Ella still, at 21 months old, having filthy food habits. The problem we're left with now is that rather than stopping eating when she's had enough, she'll take a huge mouthful, chew it up, and spit the mush all down her top - she actually used to do this throughout a meal, but I've noticed that now it's only the final mouthfuls. I want to teach her not to put that mouthful in her mouth if she doesn't want it, but am not sure how. She also fills up a mouthful of juice or water and squirts that over herself, or throws the (not yet empty) cup, and often throws her food onto the floor on purpose.
Ella loves stickers, but is 21 months old too young to understand the concept of a sticker chart? It doesn't need to be a chart - she has this strange habit of wanting stickers put on her tummy, and the sticker itself is a pretty attractive reward for her. I'm thinking of her getting a reward for each juice (it's V8 Fruit & Vege Juice before you judge me! She doesn't eat fresh fruit, so gets this) that she doesn't make a mess with (she understands "mess" very well). And one for each meal where nothing is thrown or spat. Is that too abstract for her age though? Advice would be appreciated! Ta.
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Andie
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Andie
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Posted: 30 July 2008 at 2:15pm |
...also wanted to add, I 'get' that her behaviour is probably a way of communicating to me that she's had enough food/drink. I just haven't figured out how to re-train her in how she 'says' that. It's an important issue for her, I imagine, as when she was little I force-fed her in sheer desperation to see her grow (again, please don't judge me! Trust me, there were reasons and they were scary at the time), so she's been sent some very confusing signals about how saying you've had enough is OK. She's not a big eater, never has been, but now I respect when she's not hungry, and it's time to change how she expresses that. I have tried a zero-tolerance approach to those 2 behaviours, with time out being the result, but it hasn't actually helped. I think I need to be encouraging the behaviour that I want here, rather than punishing the negative. She gets lots of praise for eating nicely or putting her cup down when she's had enough, but still, it hasn't stopped the problem.
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jack_&_charli
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Posted: 30 July 2008 at 2:24pm |
the first time i used a sticker chart with jack was when he was toilet training at 2.5yrs....it worked ok but he wasn't overally into it
i think the best thing to do is just try it.......see if ella does get the gist of it and if it improves her eating, then yay!! if not, then try something else (just don't ask me what  )
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CuriousG
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Posted: 30 July 2008 at 2:25pm |
We have just started one (last night in fact!) as before then I didn't really think Charlotte was ready. She probaby was a couple of months ago but I didn't really think of it then. We did stamps on hands for a while, but I hate the mark it leaves.
You can only give it a go and if it doesn't work, try something else till she is ready.
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MrsMojo
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Posted: 30 July 2008 at 2:33pm |
We used stickers and stamps a couple of months ago when Michaela was toilet training, they worked well but she didn't like putting them on a chart (she got quite upset actually if they weren't put on her hand) so in a sense the point of the chart, which is also to record good behaviour and work towards a goal, didn't work but the reward aspect worked a treat.
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busymum
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Posted: 30 July 2008 at 8:14pm |
It's worth giving it a try, Andie. What I found when introducing the sticker chart idea was that the girls had no interest in gaining a sticker to let it sit on a piece of paper somewhere. And a long-term goal (ie when you have 10 stickers...) is beyond their understanding. So I used to put the sticker right onto their hands and that went down very well. Sounds like you'll have to do the tummy though!
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lizzle
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Posted: 30 July 2008 at 9:11pm |
Hey Andie, this may sound dumb, but we've had some success with the technique. We model the behaviour we want and then make a big deal about it.
e.g
me: "i'm finished eating so I'm going to put down my fork nicely and my drink nicely too"
DH "WELL DONE MUMMY! jake, isn't mummy good not making a mess. let's give mummy a sticker"
jake got the drift. i am embarressed to say that we were toilet training at the time however.
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Bizzy
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Posted: 30 July 2008 at 10:48pm |
a sticker as a reward for not making a mess would be a good idea, but i really like what liz said too. i am a firm believer in positive modelling (just not very good at it myself  ) and that in conjunction with a reward system might help.
dont forget too to really praise, almost over the top praise too, her the times she doesnt make a mess and finish a meal in an acceptable manner.
i'm wondering too if maybe giving her juice in a lidded cup for a while might help, and when you see her about to put that large spoon of food in her mouth stop her before it gets to her mouth then maybe say something like, it looks like you've eaten lots there ella , lets put our spoons down and .... this is when you would suggest a new behaviour, maybe rub our tummies or wipe out mouths with our napkins... you would have to do the same with your spoon/fork too and do the new behaviour with her and it would mean that you would have to be very vigilant and watch her for her cues as to when the "bad" behaviour is about to start..
Ok, thats my suggestion... hope it makes sense and doenst sound silly or patronising or anything. eating issues suck! oh and no one would judge you, we all do what we think is right and its till later we find out if if is a success or not.
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MrsMojo
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Posted: 31 July 2008 at 8:12am |
The positive modelling and OTT praise for good behaviour has worked really well for us too.
(Liz, we used it for toilet training too)
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Andie
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Posted: 31 July 2008 at 8:19am |
Thanks, guys. Funny you say that, Liz... that's what we've been trying too! We do it at tea time and Jono and I do things like put our cups down "nicely" and ask for stuff saying "ta" or "please", then we cheer and clap and make a huge fuss of it! Ella thinks it's great and it gets her doing the same for the duration of that meal (all for the fanfare, of course!) but it's been hard to model not spitting and throwing food. I started yesterday on teaching her to say "enough", accompanied by said fanfare, again ('cause she can use the word already) when she's finished, and we'll see how that goes. And by last night she had the idea of how to get that sacred sticker for her tummy - missed out on a couple yesterday, earned a couple. I think we'll do the tummy-sticker thing rather than a chart for this one.
I agree about the sippy cups too, Bizzy. I resorted to them for my sanity (gotta love sanity!) but since realising that this is a behavioural issue rather than a developmental one, I want to beat it... beat it good!
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Andie
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Maya
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Posted: 31 July 2008 at 9:09pm |
Gremlins definitely not, they are sooo not there, but Maya at the same age, for sure. I'm sure Ella will be fine with one.
As for sippy cups, it absolutely beggars belief how the gremlins manage to tip water out of their NON SPILL sippy cups, but they do
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  The Gremlins:Sienna Marie & Mercedes Kailah (14/10/06)
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katie1
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Posted: 31 July 2008 at 9:17pm |
My friend is having success with her wee boy and a sticker chart for staying in his bed.. He has very good language for his age (24 months). It can't do any harm to try.
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