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My3Sons View Drop Down
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    Posted: 15 June 2008 at 9:38am

Mr 2 is a dummyholic!!  I was going to wait til he is a bit older and do the dummy fairy or similar when he was old enough to understand but I have decided to get rid of it soon for several reasons-

*it is starting to affect his teeth!  He is getting a slight overbite and I dont want it to get any worse.

*we only have one left in the house and I dont want to buy anymore!  God only knows where he keeps stashing them!

*he is starting to ask for it *incessantly* whenever he is tired/hurt/upset/bored etc etc and it is driving me mad.  I keep saying it is only for bedtime but he is 2 after all and likes to whinge lol!

Any tried and true ideas?  Cold turkey wont work very well for him I think as he is quite a stubborn wee man and quite set in his ways.  Would love to hear what others have done!!

Mum to Mr 10, Mr 6 and Mr 4

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Two Blondinis View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Two Blondinis Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 15 June 2008 at 11:01pm
We did the dummy fairy thing with Caitlin.
She put them all into a box and kissed them good bye, then put them in the mail box for the dummy fairy to take to all the tiny babies. Caitlin is also recently toilet trained so we just said that she's a big girl with knickers now and that only babies have dummies. She likes the "big girl" concept so that works for us. She does go out to the mail box occassionally to make sure they're still gone LOL

During the day she is fine but nights are a whole other story! She's very unsettled and doesn't know/can't resettle herself if she wakes up. It's been about a month now and she's getting better - rarely asks for her dummy though, so it might just be a coincidence and she's teething?!?! who knows?!?!

We went cold turkey because she's also moved up a stage at daycare and they don't allow dummies there. She only ever had it for sleep times. So we just decided to do it.

Perhaps just keep one for bedtimes? Then once that is sorted take it away altogether. I wasn't keen on the gradually phasing it out as I reckon she would have been confused over why it was ok to have some nights and not others, just my opinion.

Good luck
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.Mel View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote .Mel Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 16 June 2008 at 9:31am
Try this out - not sure if it wil be helpful to you, but I did recommend it to another girl on here. You can also find this information on www.pantley.com. She has some advice on there....

When Your Baby Wakes Frequently to Breastfeed or Bottle-feed

If your baby is waking up every hour or two to breastfeed, bottle-feed or locate his pacifier, you may be wondering just what it is that causes him to wake up so often. The reality is that brief nighttime awakenings are a normal part of human sleep, regardless of age. All babies experience these. The difference with your baby, who requires nighttime care every hour or two, is that he is involving you in all of his brief awakening periods.

Your baby makes a “sleep association,” wherein he “associates” certain things with falling asleep and believes he needs these things to fall asleep. My baby, Coleton, spent much time in his early months in my arms, his little head bobbing to the tune of my computer keyboard. From the very moment he was born, he slept beside me, nursing to sleep for every nap and every bedtime. By the time I looked up, he was 12 months old, firmly and totally entrenched in a breastfeeding-to-sleep association. He needed to nurse to sleep for every nap, at bedtime, and for every nighttime awakening – every hour or so, all night long.

Your baby, like my Coleton, has learned to associate sucking (having your nipple or his bottle or pacifier in his mouth) with sleeping. I have heard a number of sleep experts refer to this as a “negative sleep association.” I certainly disagree, and so would my baby! It is probably the most positive, natural, pleasant sleep association a baby can have. The problem with this association is not the association itself, but our busy lives. If you had nothing whatsoever to do besides take care of your baby, this would be a very pleasant way to pass your days and nights until he naturally outgrew the need. However, in our world, few parents have the luxury of putting everything else on hold until their baby gets older. With this in mind, I will give you a number of ideas so that you can gradually, and lovingly, help your baby learn to fall asleep without this very powerful sleep aid.

In order to take the steps to change your baby’s sleep association, you must complicate night wakings for a while, but in the long run you can wean your baby from using his pacifier, bottle, or your breast as his only nighttime association. In other words, be prepared to disrupt your own nights for a while to make some important, worthwhile long-term changes.

Pantley’s gentle removal plan

Here is one way to help your baby to learn to fall asleep without nursing, or using a bottle or pacifier. When your baby wakes, go ahead and pop his pacifier or his bottle in his mouth, or nurse him. But, instead of leaving him there and going back to bed, or letting him fall asleep at the breast, let him suck for a few minutes until his sucking slows and he is relaxed and sleepy. Then break the seal with your finger and gently remove the pacifier or nipple.

Often, especially at first, your baby then will startle and root for the nipple. Try to very gently hold his mouth closed with your finger under his chin, or apply pressure to his chin, just under his lip, while at the same time rocking or swaying with him. If he struggles against this and fusses or roots for you or his bottle or pacifier, go ahead and replace the nipple, but repeat the removal process as often as necessary until he falls asleep.

How long between removals? Every baby is different, but about ten to sixty seconds between removals usually works. You also should watch your baby’s sucking action. If a baby is sucking strongly or swallowing regularly when feeding, wait a few minutes until he slows his pace. Usually, after the initial burst of activity, your baby will slow to a more relaxed “fluttery” pace; this is a good time to begin your removal attempts.

It may take two to five (or even more) attempts, but eventually your baby will fall asleep without the pacifier or nipple in her mouth. When she has done this a number of times over a period of days, you will notice the removals are much easier, and her awakenings are less frequent.

“We got to calling this the Big PPO (Pantley-Pull-Off). At first Joshua would see it coming and grab my nipple tighter in anticipation—ouch! But you said to stick with it, and I did. Now he anticipates the PPO and actually lets go and turns and rolls over on his side to go to sleep! I am truly amazed.” …Shannon, mother of 16-month-old Joshua

If your baby doesn’t nap well, don’t trouble yourself with trying to use the removal technique during the day for naps. Good naps mean better nighttime sleep—and better nighttime sleep means better naps. Once you get your baby sleeping better at night, you can then work on the naptime sleep.

The most important time to use Pantley’s gentle removal plan is the first falling asleep of the night. Often the way your baby falls asleep will affect the rest of his awakenings for the night. I suspect that this because of the sleep-association affect that I explained earlier. It seems that the way in which your baby falls asleep for the night is how he expects to remain all night long.
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fiona10 View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote fiona10 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 19 June 2008 at 3:54pm
You can read an article about how to quit the dummy here, hope it helps
http://www.positiveparenting.co.nz/blog/view/id_15/title_how-to-quit-the-dummy/

Edited by fiona10
PositiveParenting.co.nz
social networking for parents in New Zealand
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AnnC View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote AnnC Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 19 June 2008 at 4:25pm
Originally posted by Two Blondinis Two Blondinis wrote:





We went cold turkey because she's also moved up a stage at daycare and they don't allow dummies there. She only ever had it for sleep times. So we just decided to do it.


OMG I can't beleive your daycare thought they had the right to tell you the parent when it was time to get rid of the dummy - do they also take thumbs off the thumb suckers??? That would upset me if my carer said that to me.

Rhyley only has his dummy for going to sleep - he doesn't not wake up looking for it - or if he does he doesn't wake me before hes found it. I am in no hurry getting rid of it if things carry on as they are (I am blessed with an excellent sleeper so don't want to lose that)

Advise from my other two getting rid of it. My eldest was 17 months - he was going thru a stage of not going to sleep by himself so I thought if I have to sit here hes not having that - and that was the end of the dummy - shame it didnt slove the not sleeping by himself though. My mum got rid of DD when she was 22 months as i was away and said she just took it off her as she didn't want it anyhow. I think I will wait for signs rhyley is ready to give it up like the other 2.

At 2 your son is getting old enough to understand the dummy fairy (or perhaps a more boyish thing) came and took his dummy. eg: at christmas time - leave on tree for the elves etc... Stressing hes a big boy now. Even say - its lost

Be comforted in the fact that most have given it up wayyyy before they start school etc...

sorry my ramble probably didn't give you any ideas....

oh and NOTE: don't even go there if YOU aren't in the right frame of mind as once you have taken it (given away etc...) off him as that will make it harder if you give it away...
Ann


Also Mum to Josh (15) and Brooke (10)
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