| Author |
 Topic Search  Topic Options
|
kellverona 
Senior Member
Joined: 01 January 1900
Location: Hervey Bay Australia
Points: 817
|
 Post Options
 Thanks(0)
 Quote  Reply
 Topic: hitting
Posted: 04 February 2008 at 10:04pm |
okay,
any good advice on what to do when your toddler hits you?? When Jaxon gets frustrated now he hits me or if I growl him he gets all angry , screams and hits???
 hes only just started...
|
|
|
 |
|
Sponsored Links
|
|
|
Brenna
Senior Member
Joined: 22 November 2006
Points: 2373
|
Post Options
Thanks(0)
Quote Reply
Posted: 04 February 2008 at 10:06pm |
|
Brenna has only hit a couple of times and I hold her arm and say in a firm voice "No Brenna, you don't hit people" (to which she find funny and laughs??) but then that's it. She's happy as and carries on playing
Hop you find something that works!
|
 My beautiful 2 girls...nearly 4 and 13 months
|
|
nikkitheknitter
Senior Member
Joined: 01 January 1900
Location: Westie
Points: 7556
|
Post Options
Thanks(0)
Quote Reply
Posted: 05 February 2008 at 10:17am |
|
Not rewarding behaviour like that with attention was the thing the worked for me.
I would firmly say "Hitting hurts. Use gentle hands." (Phrasing everything in the positive as the next stage is saying "don't" to everything! yay!) and then ignoring the kiddo for a minute or so - sort of an introduction to time out.
Good luck!
|
|
baalamb
Senior Member
Joined: 01 January 1900
Points: 1820
|
Post Options
Thanks(0)
Quote Reply
Posted: 05 February 2008 at 11:32am |
We're the same, we try to tell Ashlee to use gentle hands, and show her how to be nice and gentle because we know she can be. She only tends to hit when she's frustrated, and it's generally only me or DH that she hits!
It's so hard to use the positive phrasing when all you want to do is say 'NO! Don't!'
|
|
Mazzy
Senior Member
Joined: 01 January 1900
Location: Waikato
Points: 1494
|
Post Options
Thanks(0)
Quote Reply
Posted: 05 February 2008 at 1:09pm |
|
Nikki, that's pretty much what we've been doing. DD has started hitting but mostly when she gets overexcited/doesn't know how to communicate otherwise. She's got me a cropper a few times and man it hurt!
We hold her arm and say 'we don't hit, it hurts people' and then show her how to touch nicely (stroking our arm or head or whatever she just hit). If she still hits then we tell her again and move away, ignoring her for a minute.
|
|
Mum to two gorgeous girls!
|
|
Andie
Senior Member
Joined: 01 January 1900
Location: New Zealand
Points: 3614
|
Post Options
Thanks(0)
Quote Reply
Posted: 05 February 2008 at 4:17pm |
Ella will hit me when she's frustrated - she starts off with a warning tap then quickly works up to a few short, sharp slap'n'scratches across the face. I'll usually catch her after the warning shot and hold her hand, say firmly "be gentle, Ella" and take her hand and show her 'gentle' on wherever it was that she hit me. If she launches into a proper smackey-sesh after that, I hold her hands down, look her in the eye and give her a firm "no hitting, be gentle", put her down and ignore her for a minute. Seems to work. But I'm liking Nikki's positive phrasing thing now and will be tweaking my approach!
|
|
Andie
|
|
nikkitheknitter
Senior Member
Joined: 01 January 1900
Location: Westie
Points: 7556
|
Post Options
Thanks(0)
Quote Reply
Posted: 05 February 2008 at 4:47pm |
Yeah, I did the positive phrasing thing out of necessity as every word out of Hannah's mouth was "don't!"
It was really freaking hard and I found myself all the time starting with "Don't say don... oh feck." (Yeah, I know - managed to kick the 'don't' habit but haven't attempted the terrible swearing  )
It's really hard but does work!
Edited by nikkiwhyte
|
|
Paws
Senior Member
Joined: 01 January 1900
Location: Auckland
Points: 5860
|
Post Options
Thanks(0)
Quote Reply
Posted: 05 February 2008 at 6:42pm |
|
We start by saying "STOP! That hurts mummy (or whoever) be gentle please". If she does it again we repeat what we siad but warn her that if she keeps hitting then she will go on the naughty chair. Third time, repeat to stop and warning of naughty chair. One more strike and she is out! Hello naughty chair.
Edited by Paws
|
|
|
|
busymum
Senior Member
Joined: 01 January 1900
Location: New Zealand
Points: 12236
|
Post Options
Thanks(0)
Quote Reply
Posted: 05 February 2008 at 8:41pm |
|
We hold hand down firmly and say 'gentle', then use her hand to stroke wherever she hit in gentle fashion. 2nd time = being put down on the floor at our feet. (This is for our 13mo.)
|
|
|
|
julie
Newbie
Joined: 04 December 2003
Points: 1
|
Post Options
Thanks(0)
Quote Reply
Posted: 06 February 2008 at 8:50pm |
hi - i too would love advice - i get hit, kicked and the occasional head butt - sometimes from tantrums but more often when he gets way too excited!
Time out doesnt work for him....
|
|
nikkitheknitter
Senior Member
Joined: 01 January 1900
Location: Westie
Points: 7556
|
Post Options
Thanks(0)
Quote Reply
Posted: 07 February 2008 at 12:29pm |
|
Julie - could you explain a bit more about why time out doesn't work? Might be useful to know what the issues there are to find alternatives or make 'time out' more successful.
I mean, often its more about time out for me than it is about time out for hannah!
|
|
hitting
