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Maya
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Topic: How do I stop this? Posted: 30 March 2008 at 2:41pm |
I know there have been threads about biting before, but this is getting out of control! Sienna did this to Mercedes face this morning while I was less than 2 feet away! Poor Mercedes also has a bite on her spine and one on her leg.
I respond to it immediately by picking Sienna up and moving her away and then making a big fuss over Mercedes, but Sienna seems to have no idea, or she just doesn't care, that what she is doing is wrong. She just gets up and continues on with whatever she was doing.
She definitely bites in anger or frustration coz it's always as a response to them fighting over a toy etc. rather than just randomly biting, but I'm at a loss how to stop it. I also don't want Mercedes to develop a "victim" complex where she doesn't stand up for herself.
I'm open to any suggestions! All the research I've read is related to older kids (2+) so I'm wondering if this early biting is a twin thing, and a result of them spending 24-7 together.
PS. I'm not keen on my nana's tried and true suggestion of biting her back
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 Maya Grace (28/02/03)
 (02/01/06)
  The Gremlins:Sienna Marie & Mercedes Kailah (14/10/06)
 Lil miss:Chiara Louise Chloe (09/07/08)
 Her ladyship:Rosalia Sophie Anais (18/06/12)
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Bizzy
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Posted: 30 March 2008 at 3:10pm |
if you know her triggers then i am afraid it may be up to you to divert her before she bites...
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arohanui
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Posted: 30 March 2008 at 3:21pm |
Wow! Sorry no advice but that is a very impressive bite mark.. my goodness...
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Mama to DS1 (5 years), DS2 (3 years) and...
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Kellz
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Posted: 30 March 2008 at 3:24pm |
Do you tell Sienna off before u move her away? I do the supernanny thing, of getting down to Isla's level, so we are face to face, tell her in a stern voice that 'Mummy doesnt like it when u do.......' and tell her 'you have to sit here now til Mummy comes back becuase u were naughty',....then ignore her for 1 min,...we just keep putting her back there without talking to her or eye contact, if she gets up. Its worked for us so far!
Maybe it is a twin thing, really hope its not and its just a phase that u are able to nip in the bud quick smart.
Poor poor Mercedes, man that looks sooo sore. Anica may help
Edited by Kellz
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Kels
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Posted: 30 March 2008 at 3:51pm |
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Busy mum to Miss 15yrs, Miss 10yrs and Master 4yrs
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Bombshell
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Posted: 30 March 2008 at 5:59pm |
OUCH!!!
yeah diversion when they are getting into it might help...ive seen them in action and there is usually a lead up to the attack with them....
and if it worstens remove the attacked after telling her off if it continues and ignore her and concentrate on the other one...excluding the naughty one....then slowly let her back in....and she should  start behaving and seeing how the "good" one gets treated with you focusing attention on her....
if all that fails - SELL her on Trademe! **joking** (well half joking! LOL)
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nikkitheknitter
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Posted: 30 March 2008 at 6:11pm |
Oh poor little babe!!!
I read a few articles on biting (though by no means am an expert as I couldn't really do much!) but anyway, for what it's worth this is what I would do - unfortunately it may take a bit of effort.
Shadowing Sienna and watching for triggers, ready to divert when things get close to biting times and/or offering alternative means of settling disputes.
For us it was the communication thing - really working on getting Hannah to use her language instead of biting.
It sort of worked  but has only really righted itself now she can talk a lot more.
Good luck!! And be thankful you don't have the guilt of another mother's disgust bearing down upon you!! But poor little Mercedes
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nikkitheknitter
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Posted: 30 March 2008 at 6:12pm |
Eek, just re-read and poor Mercedes too!!!
Just wanted to also say, they learn pretty quick that biting is the quick way to get what they want - so you really have to counter that before they realise
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thunderwolves
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Posted: 30 March 2008 at 7:34pm |
At work I find making the biter sit there and watch the other child crying can have a big effect on them. We have a little menace of a bit about the same age and after we have finished growling we make her sit there and watch the other child upset and getting lots of attention, only thing with this is you need two adults, one to help the hurt child and one to growl at the other one..
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Rachael21
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Posted: 30 March 2008 at 8:33pm |
Aww poor Mercedes. All the kids at playgroup had marks like that just after Caprece was born.
In the end the thing that stopped it pretty quickly was removing him any time he even looked like he was going in for the bite, no talking just straight to a naughty place. We used a wee side room at playgroup but anywhere undesirable works. In the mornings we would remind Jack no biting and he can always call for me and I will help but if he bites it straight to time out. After we let him out of time out I would sit down and play with him and make a big deal out of his good playing. When we did this it only took one day of constant time out and no attention. Jack was 17 months at the time.
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floss
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Posted: 30 March 2008 at 9:35pm |
Oh poor Mercedes that looks nasty!
Sorry no advice but I hope its not a twin thing!!! My two have already started being mean to one another Noah likes to pull Lola's sticky out ears if she is close enough
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My beautiful big girl Sienna 15.04.06
Double the trouble double the fun Noah & Lola 10/11/07
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Two Blondinis
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Posted: 30 March 2008 at 11:52pm |
This isn't specific to biting but I've heard that if you make the child who caused the pain "look after" the other one they learn the consequences to their actions. So get Sienna to give her sister a kiss and hug and make her hold a cold face cloth to the bite.
Make her take ownership for what she did - maybe then she'll realise what she did is not nice.
I don't think your girls are too young for this method, they're pretty smart (good genes lol  )
Also - lots of arnica!!! Poor 'cedes!
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Maya
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Posted: 31 March 2008 at 3:14pm |
LOL Toni and you were worried about Miss C being a bully to them - I told you they are far worse to each other!
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 Maya Grace (28/02/03)
 (02/01/06)
  The Gremlins:Sienna Marie & Mercedes Kailah (14/10/06)
 Lil miss:Chiara Louise Chloe (09/07/08)
 Her ladyship:Rosalia Sophie Anais (18/06/12)
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nikkitheknitter
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Posted: 31 March 2008 at 6:04pm |
hrmmm... I like Toni's suggestion.
Let us know how you get on Emma - I know a lot of mamas could benefit from your tales... I know I would have!!
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Two Blondinis
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Posted: 31 March 2008 at 7:15pm |
You should write a book Emma!
"How I survived The Gremlins - and lived to have an Iggle Piggle"
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Maya
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Posted: 31 March 2008 at 7:18pm |
I like it Toni! One day when I *have* survived them I might just do that!
Today was OK, no biting (that I know of) and the only near-incident was when I was changing Mercedes on the floor at Mels and Sienna got jealous coz she wanted to lie on the mat and grabbed a clawful of Mercedes' eyes. But I intervened and no harm done, phew!
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 Maya Grace (28/02/03)
 (02/01/06)
  The Gremlins:Sienna Marie & Mercedes Kailah (14/10/06)
 Lil miss:Chiara Louise Chloe (09/07/08)
 Her ladyship:Rosalia Sophie Anais (18/06/12)
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NeoshasMummy
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Posted: 31 March 2008 at 9:07pm |
My gosh thats huge! Gotta hurt. Sorry Im not at this stage but will be looking forward to seeing other answers on how to combat this. Mine is the hitting stage at the mo
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 Mrs Te Kani ❤️ Neosha 26/5/2007
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Kelpa
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Posted: 01 April 2008 at 11:17am |
Oh NO!
Blake bites..and my immediate reaction is to YELL! :(
WE do have the naughty hallway and I will put him in there with all the doors shut and light on and leave him there IF I REMEMBER FAST ENUF!!!.
Like you Blake doesnt seem to notice much of what he has done unless I remove him straight away and Say a firm NO.
Highly frustrating :o(
I have tried biting him back and he just laughs and then when I did do it harder he really cried so i felt worse than when I "lock him away" !
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