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busybee View Drop Down
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Joined: 29 January 2009
Points: 199 		Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote busybee Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Topic: How long
    Posted: 09 April 2009 at 3:29pm
I need some honest answers, pleeese...how long did it take before you felt emotionally ok after you miscarriage?It has been 2 weeks since I found out and I am not longer weepy, I am pretty OK...is that even normal? I still get sad when I see pregnant woman and think that the little one could have been a little person by now but I no longer collaps in tears. I had a feeling something was wrong in the last week so I don't know if that prepared me mentally for the shock?
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Kazzle View Drop Down
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Joined: 01 January 1900
Location: Porirua
Points: 3830 		Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Kazzle Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 09 April 2009 at 4:44pm
firstly big hugs that you are going through this, its such hard thing to go through.

secondly everybody grieves differently, i found that after my miscarriages it depended on whether i knew within myself that something was wrong or if i was taken by suprise.

I find that i do my grieving pretty quickly then move on and that okay, and if it takes longer then thats okay too.

As long as you remember to look after yourself and just be kind to yourself you will be okay, and if you find you get the odd day where you still grieve then just go with it.


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busymum View Drop Down
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Points: 12236 		Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote busymum Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 09 April 2009 at 7:47pm
It would have taken me a week or two, and I didn't even know I was pregnant (nor was I trying) until I m/c - give yourself lots of time because it's very emotional.
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minik8e View Drop Down
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Points: 5838 		Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote minik8e Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 09 April 2009 at 9:52pm
I'm much like Kazzle. The last m/c I was miserable for about a week (to the extent DH was worried about me) and then I seemed to bounce back. It doesn't mean I don't think about any of my angels - it just means I accepted that it was what happened and there was nothing I could do about it. Everyone grieves differently.
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WestiesGirl View Drop Down
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Location: Aotearoa - In the 'Sunny' S.I
Points: 4550 		Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote WestiesGirl Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 09 April 2009 at 11:20pm
Honestly, it felt like ages for me!!!! The first 2 weeks were the worst, I would cry at the drop of a hat and would cry when people said they were sorry to hear the news etc. I didnt mind talking about it, in fact that kinda made it easier. I guess it was the thought we'd lost our baby that was the hard part.

Byu the 2nd month I was pretty good. Only small things would set me off like thinking how far along I would have been and seeing my positive blood test result etc.

There is still not a single day that goes by that I dont think of my angel and what would have been. But I can manage it now.

Take your time to grieve, I promise it does get easier. Everyone is different and what might take one person a day, may take another person a month
Our Angel July 08 Gone but not forgotten

And to complete our family, our princess has arrived
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littlestar View Drop Down
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Points: 810 		Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote littlestar Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 10 April 2009 at 3:31pm
Hugs Yo,

Unfortunately there is no set rule on how long a person will grieve for. You will take as long as you need to and you will never forget you first baby.

I couldn't get out of bed for a few days - but I did feel a million times better when I got up, showered and dressed. Even though I have another baby on the way I still think I would have been 24 weeks now.... or wonder if my bub was a boy or girl. Listening to the ladies on OB talk about their MC or pregnancies would set me off (for longer than I care to admit)

Obviously we were ready to move on fairly quickly (would appear my body was one step ahead of me though) Don't ever feel like you are taking too short or long a time to come to terms with your loss.
I would tell myself I had only really had a few weeks to bond with my baby - but I was amazed at how strong a bond forms in that short time

Hugs hon!

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