m ranting!

HI all
I have really come on here to have a bit of a rant more than any thing, please feel free to ignore me! I need to vent!

I had my 3rd miscarriage in December, another very much loved and wanted little one who keeps tugging at my heart strings.

I have felt as though people have very much ignored this one and have the attitude, it's her third, she will cope, guys, GET REAL GUYS, it doesn't get easier, it gets harder!

The comments we have had from people have been unbelievable. My cousin who lost her job at Christmas said because of that she knows "exactly how I feel" HELLO! Then she lectured me on how good my mother was to come all the way to see me, (I'm in Auckland, she is in Hawkes Bay) and then in the same breath she complained that my mother hadn't been around to see her, what is it with her! What a winner, shame you can't choose your family!

Another comment I have had from a different cousin who was happily 7 months pregnant at the time "you can't count the first miscarriage as it was such a long time ago". Sorry????? I should be a mother to a nearly 10 year old, how does that not count????

One of my DP's friends said to him, "if I was stressed it's no wonder I lost the baby" *#$@ Honestly, that has to be one of the most insensitive things I have ever heard in my life, what a winner, small minded little man!

I'm have trouble enough blaming myself.

Another thing, I don't need to know about your birth stories and that you know how I feel. Just because it took you 6 months to conceive does not even come close to this. I would rather take 4 years to conceive than lose a little baby I have grown attached to, been sick with, changed shape for, seen a wee heart beat, fallen in love with and looked forward to being a Mum for.

I don't begrudge anyone a healthy little on, I'm as jealous as hell actually! You get to hold your precious little one. I have empty aching arms not to mention a heavy heart that I don't think will ever heal.

Sorry about the ramble, writing it down feels better.

As you were and thanks for listening

A x

I've only had one m/c I couldn't imagine how horrible having 3 would be. Some people are really dumb and would probably never understand unless they lived it themselves.

I hope you get a sticky baby soon and that you don't get anymore dumb comments from insensitive jerks.

i have suffered two and know some people say the stupiest things and worse that they really believe them!!

Big hugs I've had 2 miscarriages & I hope to never have a third.

It doesn't excuse their insensitivity, but they are probably just trying to help (in a wierd sick twisted way). Also I think some people just feel awkward & don't know what to say so they end up saying something stupid. Still, it's no excuse & they should know better.

Good Monring people!

Thanks for all your kind words of thoughts and support, I really do appracite it. Funny, the most support I have had is from people I don't know! Thanks!

Weegee, I keep up with all you guys in Due July, I laugh and cry when reading it. I miss you all and so want to join in. I've loved seeing the bumps that have appeared.

My Due date for June MC is coming up (28 Jan) and my first little one would have been born late January too, so I think that's why I'm feeling so grumpy with the world.

Enjoy your day

A xx

Pook72 wrote: Weegee, I keep up with all you guys in Due July, I laugh and cry when reading it. I miss you all and so want to join in. I've loved seeing the bumps that have appeared.

I did the same thing with my due date thread.

I just wanted to send you big hugs!

People can be so darn insensitive!

Hugs Pook72
Rant away - we get it and we're here for any ranting you need.
People who haven't been through this kind of loss say the dumbest things and just don't realise that it hurts.
I am so sorry that you have had to go through this 3 times now - its heart breaking.


Edited by littlestar