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kiwikid
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Topic: Dinner Time Bribery Posted: 05 August 2010 at 9:38am |
Does anyone else do it? How bad on scale of 'setting myself up for future drama' is it?
I've had AMAZING success over the past week with bribing DS (2yrs) during meal times and its working really well, we had these left over desert biscuit thingies, like a Chocolate Finger but quarter the width and twice as long and I said if DS ate all his green beans he could have a 'chocolate stick' for pudding (he'd seen them at his birthday party so knew what I was talking about) OMG he the bloody lot for the first time ever!!!!
Next night he asked for a chocolate stick and I said if you eat up all your tomato and he ate three cherry tom's halved so 6 mouthfuls of tomato - he didnt enjoy it but blardy hell he ate the lot (and 80% his mash potato and chicken which I was happy with). Normally he'd lick one half, do a spitty performance and refuse to eat any of it.
I know I'm probably doing something hideously wrong but right now I'm thinking the nutritional plus of green beans and home grown tomato's outweighs the sugar / bad habit I'm creating
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kiwisj
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Joined: 02 June 2008
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Posted: 05 August 2010 at 12:52pm |
Once the chocolate sticks run out will he be happy with a different bribe (eg one without chocolate, something that you're happier with him eating more often?) And then maybe further down the track you can stop offering the bribe every day?
My DS is old enough to understand bribery yet and also hasn't got to the picky eater stage, so I don't do it. But I wouldn't rule it out necessarily!
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SJ
Callum - Dec 2008
Daniel - Oct 2010
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fire_engine
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Posted: 05 August 2010 at 1:16pm |
Meh, I get really annoyed with the PC books that say not to bribe your child. We do it but mix up what is offered. We don't have an issue with Dan having something after his main course, so we might use fruit that he likes, a bikkie, smoothie (which he loves) .... I only do it with dinner as I'm trying to be a bit harder during the day.
I'd suggest you start mixing it up. Use "dessert" or what ever is on offer for the second course as the bribe rather than one specific item.
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Mum to two wee boys
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Nikki
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Location: West Auckland
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Posted: 09 August 2010 at 1:04pm |
We have bribed Jake with dessert for ages now and its still working. I only have to do it at dinner time as he eats really well the rest of the day. I felt terrible about it too (DH started it!) .... but at the end of the day he is eating all his dinner now, even though we still get some complaints and moaning ... and he always had a second course anyway. I use chocolate yoghurt alot, or fruit (he LOVES fruit) so its not always something really unhealthy. But we have used the odd lollie or two in the past when he was being really fussy. It gets better. Hang in there.
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DS (5yrs) and DD (3yrs)
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kiwikid
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Posted: 10 August 2010 at 7:44pm |
TBH this is one of the first 'no no's' that I've kinda embraced, honestly I could never ever get him to eat a bean or peas or tomatos and now he's eating them every night and actually getting used to the textures and flavours and not even retching LOL
In this instance I've decided I dont really care if its not the perfect thing to do, we are getting clean plate at dinner time every night!! In another week or so I might start looking at weaning off the Chocolate Sticks (only ever one a night and they really are half as thin as a pencil), I havent given him chocolate yogurts or anything, only ever has organic no added sugar yogurt which is very LOL now he's having these chocolate sticks semi-regularly, wonder if switching to a fancy kids yogurt would acheive the same??
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kiwisj
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Posted: 12 August 2010 at 12:30pm |
The real chocolate is probably better for him than the fancy kids yoghurt  Have you seen how much cr*p is in that stuff?!?! Great that it's working so well and that he's eating new foods. If you want to wean off the chocolate maybe you could give him half a stick for a few nights and then try telling him you've run out or something? And go back to your normal yoghurt?
(TBH I'd probably just stick with the teeny choc stick myself)
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SJ
Callum - Dec 2008
Daniel - Oct 2010
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myfullhouse
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Posted: 12 August 2010 at 8:32pm |
Why is is bribery? Isn't it more choices and consequences which is an important life lesson!?!  He is learning that if he choses to eat the vege he gets a good consequence. I don't think there is anything wrong with it as long as you aren't doing it all day for everything! He is learning that sometimes you have to do something you may not quite like to get a reward at the end of it, isn't that what happens when we go to work!?!
I say if it is working for you then go for it
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mollycat
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Posted: 13 August 2010 at 2:31pm |
Oh thank god Linzy you said something. I read this a few days ago and thought "geez, am I that crazy mom that people think feeds their child crap??" Since DS was about 10 months I've been giving him dessert as a reward for eating well at lunch and dinner. If he eats well and tries everything on his tray I'll give him something sweet afterwards and explain to him that "since you ate so well for lunch and tried everything on your tray that means that you get dessert" and seriously dessert might be a marshmallow or 3 chocolate chips or a small piece of the cookie I'm eating. I look at it as part of life. There will always be treats but the lesson is that if you eat your main food well THEN you get a treat not that you gorge on them once in a while at special occasions. I don't know - maybe I"m wrong
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