Feeling really pi*sed off.

Well, as you might know, it's happening again. I am sitting here waiting for the ineveitable to happen, knowing I have a blighted ovum. For the third time.

I am so angry. Last two times this happened, it took my body weeks to work out that there was no baby in the sac. And then the MC was hideous and painful (worse than childbirth) and I ended up having a D&C.

I don't want to just sit here and let three months of my life go by on this. Does that sound callous? I know there is no baby, so I just want everything done so I can get back on with my life. I am sad and grieving, but I knew this pregnancy was doomed, so it is more for the loss of the dreams I had. The stupid plans I made in my head, the mental decorations I did to the spare room, the thoughts of what life would be like with two. Why did I even bother? I am so angry with myself for knowing that this could happen, but still not being sensible.

I don't want to feel mad but I am so angry with my body for doing this to me again and me not understanding why I keep having blighted ovums. Is there something wrong with me? Or DH? Surely your body shouldn't keep doing this. It's really not fair.

Does anyone know if there is a way I can speed this up and get it over with?

Sorry to hear about your loss. Your post made me so sad. The lack of support for MC is unbelievable.

You need to contact you MW or if you don’t have one you need to contact your GP. They will refer you to the local hospital (usually the Emergency department) where you will see the on call gynaecologist who will offer you the option of a D+C or some Pills to take (I would personally recommend the pills over D+C).

You should not wait for it to happen naturally if you dont want to.

Man Laurie I can't imagine how you are feeling at the moment, I'm so gutted for you!

I don't have any advice, but I just wanted to send you a big hug

Sometimes life just sucks.

Just to say I feel for you and big hugs your way.

massive hugs to you....

if it were me i would talk to the mw or doc and have a DandC right away.. i never had the pills but i had the DandC cause i found out 4 weeks later and they were worried about infection and i couldnt handle waiting to mc naturally(had a natural one after that and preferred the DandC)

hugs to you..life is unfair:(

from me too.
I dont know what your options are, but if you want to speed up the process as others have said there is the pills or a DnC... I would go see your GP or MW and see what they can do for you. I would think your body would catch on pretty quick this time as your HCGs were pretty low (from memory, sorry I cant remember exactly) (rather than being massively high and needing time to come down)
If you want someone IRL to talk to Im in Wgtn too, and am quite happy to be an ear if you want
Hugs hun...

Aww hun sorry to hear this You should definitely speak to your MW or Dr about it. When I had a BO I wanted to let nature take its course but after a week of on going spotting and monitoring my HCG levels I was over it and wanted it gone so I asked for a D&C.

Thinking of you hun

Hi ladies,

And so it drags on and on. HCG has still been rising (it did in my previous miscarriages) but still very low. To put it in perspective, HCG is now 1,200 at 6.5 weeks, with Jackson it was 27,000 at 6 weeks.

Today I had a scan, and just like the last times, it showed a tiny sac, measuring about 4.5 weeks.

I am tired of hearing the bullsh*t. Being told my dates could be wrong. No - they can't be! Firstly, I only had sex around my normal ovulation time then got really sick and it was the last thing I felt like. Plus, I got a strong positive on a preg test two days before AF. How could I be two weeks out? Not possible. Being told that it's always impossible to see anything in a sac that size, so to come back in a week to see if anything has changed.

They keep saying it's too early to know for sure, even though this is EXACTLY what happened the last two times. My HCG rose then, and an ultrasound showed a tiny sac with nothing else. Last time, I didn't start bleeding until 10 weeks, even though we knew at 7 weeks it was all over. I played their game, tried to have a natural miscarriage, but when I was still bleeding at 12 weeks they finally gave me a D&C. Interestingly, reading my Fertility Associate notes from when I got pregnant with Jackson, our specialist wondered if it was the D&C that cleared everything out and created a good endometrium for when we did conceive 6 weeks later.

Why will noone trust my instincts. And my history? I now have to have more HCG. And another scan in a week and then they will refer me to the system, where I will probably have to muck around for days.

Why do they put people through this trauma? It's horrible. I appreciate the need to be sure, but when I am so, so very sure of my dates, can't we just proceed from here. This "pregnancy" is not going anywhere. I would have given anything to be proven wrong at my scan today, but it was not to be.

Not to mention I start a new job in just over two weeks, and am going on a 5 day tramp in four weeks, so I need to get this sorted before then. It's causing me stress and lost sleep, I feel sick all the time (thanks HCG) and am an emotional wreck. It took me so long to get over the depression from Jackson's feeding issues and start feeling normal again, and now this.

It sucks to be me right now.

Edited by kiwilaurie