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kebakat
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Topic: Lovely tantrums Posted: 08 September 2008 at 6:08pm |
What do you do when your toddler has a tantrum when at home and also when you are out?
Daniel has discovered how to throw a real good tantrum over the last couple of weeks and is doing it over anything that doens't quite go his way which I get is normal and also blimmin irritating
He throws them about being put in his carseat, arches his back and goes stiff as so its really really difficult to get him in it and I don't want to just let him get away with it.
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cuppatea
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Posted: 08 September 2008 at 6:25pm |
I normally change tone and ask him to listen to me, explain what is happening and why and praise him for being good. i.e laying still why I do his nappy. Something like the car seat you probably just need to force him in there until he realises it is pointless fighting, but maybe also explain why he has to be in there.
Other tantrums I generally either distract or I just totally ignore him and when he realises he isn't getting any attention for it he normally stops, or he sees something and distracts himself. Sometimes trying to help him calm down winds him up more so its just a case of making sure he can't hurt himself and then letting him go for it.
So far we haven't had any when out (will probably have one tomorrow now..lol), he is generally a lot quieter, more reserved and bit clingy when out so I think that stops him from demanding things to be his way the same as he does at home.
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HippyMama
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Posted: 08 September 2008 at 7:25pm |
It depends on the reason for the tanty (if there is one), at home I either a) comfort b) ignore completely or c) distract.
When we are out the same criteria apply, if I am in a position to carry on I do - and if people want to give me dirty looks then that's their problem! I do try to calm or distract her though, if I can. If it is a *real* doozy she usually just has to be left.
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Remember, you are not managing an inconvenience; You are raising a human being. ~ Kittie Franz
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Two Blondinis
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Posted: 08 September 2008 at 7:34pm |
Caitlin is teething something shocking at the moment and with that comes the mother of all tantys!
Picture the scene: We're in the middle of Britomart train station on our way home from taking her to the Ellerslie Fairy Festival (ungrateful lil' minx!!!!) she didn't want to get off the train, and I didn't want to end up in Pukekohe so we had to get off to change trains.
Miss C had other ideas and threw herself on the floor, screaming "NO! IT'S MY TRAIN"
What did I do?
Left her to do her thing on the floor and just stood between her and the tracks. There was no point reasoning with her it was well past that stage
After she was finished she laid on the floor, I picked her up and within minutes she was asleep on my lap on the right train home
Blardy kids! lol
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mummy_becks
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Posted: 08 September 2008 at 7:37pm |
Haha the carseat one. I have that all the time when I pick them up from daycare. I tell him that he has to go in and it is a save place to be in, in the car. If that doesn't work I have to push him in the seat and do it up. I tell him that if he hurts sitting in the seat he will have to sit in it properly next time.
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I was a puree feeder, forward facing, cot sleeping, pram pushing kind of Mum... and my kids survived!
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kebakat
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Posted: 08 September 2008 at 7:45pm |
The carseat drives me mental because he goes so rigid it can be really really hard to get the monster in it! And 2 weeks ago I never had an issue grrr lol.
He's doing the same with the pram at the moment too but the annoying thing with that is is that hes not walking by himself yet (he can if we are holding both his hands) so I can't exactly not take the pram when we are going in the mall etc.
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Mum2ET
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Posted: 08 September 2008 at 8:03pm |
I always bring food with me everywhere we go out- if she looks like she is going to throw a tantrum getting into the carseat I normally give her cracker and that keeps her quiet.
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kebakat
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Posted: 08 September 2008 at 8:05pm |
Food doesnt have the same effect on Daniel, he would more likely throw it at me lol
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FionaS
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Posted: 08 September 2008 at 8:05pm |
We have wobblies over e-v-e-r-y-t-h-i-n-g at the mo. We've had to stop brushing teeth for a few days and will try again once she's had a small break...the fight was rediculous. No matter how many songs we do or games we try she doesn't want to know. I guess it passes in due course...
You are not alone :)
It seems to me that when they reach an age where they CAN actually communicate a fair bit, they revert to not communicating with words and having wobblies! I know Elle can communicate almost anything but is having a patch of choosing not to. I guess their emotions are just too big for them.
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Mum2ET
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Posted: 08 September 2008 at 8:09pm |
does he have a favourite toy that you could leave in the car, so that would distract him? i got given a baby MP3 player for Ella was has kids songs on it and we always leave it in the car so she has something different to play with when she is in there? either that or I leave one of her soft toys in the car for a while and then just rotate in every couple of weeks.
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Bombshell
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Posted: 08 September 2008 at 9:45pm |
Pearls wrote:
It depends on the reason for the tanty (if there is one), at home I either a) comfort b) ignore completely or c) distract.
When we are out the same criteria apply, if I am in a position to carry on I do - and if people want to give me dirty looks then that's their problem! I do try to calm or distract her though, if I can. If it is a *real* doozy she usually just has to be left. |
we are very similar!!!!
Ella will tanty and I will say "ooh nice tanty" - heck I know if she is hurt or just being a drama queen - and OMG she does it soooo much better than me!
the car seat etc - when we do get it...usually after a lot of in and outs for the day...i say "ooh look a horse" or similar...little fibby wont hurt and my goodness it works!!! or "well if you hurry up and sit down we can go watch barney" - reaction "barn?" and she calms down....lucky me i have the easily distracted child....i have a friend who has a planker child - straight out no bending her!!!!!!!! total fighter!!!
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Bombshell
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Posted: 08 September 2008 at 9:47pm |
oh yeah - at home....i walk over or around her and keep going....she does an awesome one pounding the floor with arms and legs sometimes...but i just pick up a mag and say "ooh bubbas" and she is up and grabbing the mag toofind those bubbas so quick....sad but true my child says "shiloh" and "suri" LMAO!!!
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cuppatea
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Posted: 08 September 2008 at 9:48pm |
Is he ticklish? One other thing I do with Spencer sometimes to stop a tanty from taking hold is start to tickle him or blow on his face (which he also finds hilarious). Perhaps you could tickle Daniel in the armpits and then when he crumples quickly strap him in?
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kebakat
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Posted: 09 September 2008 at 9:18am |
His fav toys unfortunately wouldn't fit in the car lol
I'll try the tickle thing for the carseat next time!
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CuriousG
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Posted: 09 September 2008 at 11:21am |
Usually for us there is a reason why and at the moment its cause she wants to do EVERYTHING by herself.
With the carseat, how about asking him if he can do it himself and praise him when he gets his arms through etc. Its worth a shot aye!
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kebakat
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Posted: 09 September 2008 at 12:02pm |
Around the house is kind of easy because I ignore it and tell DH not to laugh at it and if he's still going after about 30 seconds - a minute I move him somewhere else and he shuts up eventually with his new situation.
The stern no gets lots of screams and tears here. Sometimes I just really want to laugh but I try and just walk away and leave him to it.
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kebakat
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Posted: 09 September 2008 at 1:45pm |
He hasn't done that... however, its just hilarious watching him act like a complete idiot over nothing, at home that is, in public its highly embarassing.
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caitlynsmygirl
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Posted: 09 September 2008 at 8:45pm |
you know what?Caitlyn never had a tantrum .
How boring , i was looking forward to laughing at her .
HOWWWEVER i now have a very over dramatic six year old
"you think im stupid ! everyone HATES ME , you love the cat / book /picture of a baby more than ME ! "
so perhaps the tantrums at this age will get it out of their system
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cuppatea
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Posted: 09 September 2008 at 8:54pm |
Spencer threw some real good ones today, thankfully after we got home. I actually had to leave the room cos I was gonna laugh at him. He threw himself to the floor, doing this cross between a squeal and a cry and then was rolling one way then the other. This was all because the curtains didn't do what he wanted them to  No idea what he wanted from them, but they weren't co-operating.
He also added in something new today which was to try and rip his top and then his belt off, he was very very angry, I picked him up but he tried to rip my hair out and generally attack my face so I put him back on the floor and ignored him. That one was because he pushed a toy into the shelf of the TV cabinet and couldn't reach to get it out again.
I'm so not looking forward to these tantrums going public
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kebakat
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Posted: 10 September 2008 at 7:35am |
That sounds like Daniel almost exactly!02
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