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mylilmosaic View Drop Down
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    Posted: 18 October 2008 at 9:50pm
Hi all

Some of you may already know that we went for an eight weeks scan on Friday and were excitedly waiting to see a heartbeat only to be told by the sonographer that our baby measured 8 1/2 weeks but had no heartbeat We were and still are absolutely devastated

I now know this is called a missed miscarriage and I am wondering whether any one else has gone through this and gone on the naturally miscarry. Im hoping that because this has only just happened that I might miscarry naturally in the next week or so. I'm not sure how realistic it is that I'm thinking like this

My other question is how many miscarriages do you have to have before we can see a specialist to rule out any other problems that may be causing this to happen?
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mummy_becks View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote mummy_becks Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 18 October 2008 at 10:11pm

Sorry to hear about this. The norm is after 3 misscarrages you can see a specialist.

I was a puree feeder, forward facing, cot sleeping, pram pushing kind of Mum... and my kids survived!
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BusyMum2three View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote BusyMum2three Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 18 October 2008 at 10:23pm
Hi Jax

I am really sorry that this has happened to you. We suffered a blighted ovum in July, we went off to the specialists all happy and came out devastated when they couldnt find an egg sac or a baby....my medical report from the hospital says 'missed miscarriage' I wonder if they are the same thing???

I started to miscarry naturally eventually, about 3 weeks after my first scan showed nothing and then opted for a D&C, my reasons for this were that I wanted the best start when we decided to TTC again.

Big hugs to you my dear, please feel free to PM me if you want/need to chat....
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mylilmosaic View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote mylilmosaic Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 18 October 2008 at 10:42pm
Hey Rach, I think they are the same thing. In that a missed miscarriage is when you lose the pregnancy before 20 weeks but have not actually miscarried yet. Hope that makes sense. Thanks for your words.
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mum2paris View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote mum2paris Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 18 October 2008 at 11:42pm
Hi there Rach. nope as far as i know a blighted ovum is different, in that basically things fail to develop.     whereas a missed misscarriage is usually the fact that the baby's heart has stopped beating for some reason, and it is usually picked up much later at a routine scan that baby stopped growing etc earlier than dates would suggest they are, or when the mum finally starts bleeding.

Rach i had the same thing as you, we went off to our 8 week scan and had the kids with us even, to see a beautiful wee perfect formed bubba, measuring right for dates if not a little bigger, and didn't even realise until they told us that they couldn't find a heartbeat or blood flow to baby.

I waited another week "just in case" for another scan to absolutely confirm, then another nearly 2 weeks until i could get in to have a D&C due to strikes thru the hospital. In that time i still continued to have morning sickness, sore bb's etc, my body had no signs of catching on really. Had i not requested that early scan i'd never have known until goodness knows when.

I am sorry to hear that you are going through this. it's terrible to have absolutely no warning at all and think things are fine only to go to a scan and find out that this isn't so.

huge hugs to you.
Janine and her 2 cool chicks, Paris & Ayja

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Kels View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Kels Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 19 October 2008 at 2:35am

lots of hugs! take care


Busy mum to Miss 15yrs, Miss 10yrs and Master 4yrs
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Vanillabean View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Vanillabean Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 19 October 2008 at 10:03am
Oh Jax, I am so so sorry to hear this. Its so unfair.

You probably know I am in a similar situation, except I went for a 7 week scan and the fetus hadn't developed at all. I am waiting for a second scan just to double check that nothing has changed and then I want to have a d&c so that I will be able to have a chromosomal analysis done on the POC.

I think it can be very variable how long it may take to miscarry naturally. I go to an acupuncturist and she said she would be able to help speed up a natural mc, so if you can find a acupuncturist in your area that may be an option.

The public system won't do testing for recurrent mc until you have had 3, but I strongly recommend going to see a specialist privately to have the tests. I did and it only cost about $200 for the consultation and the tests were free.

Once again, I am so so sorry. I know I never expected ttc to be such a long hard journey and I am so sorry its turning out that way for you too.
5x mc, Jan 08, June 08, Nov 08, May 09, April 11


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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote cuppatea Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 19 October 2008 at 1:30pm
So sorry for your loss. I had what vanillabean had, went for a scan at 6 weeks and baby only measured 4 (so no baby just a tiny empty pregnancy sac). Thankfully I miscarried naturally 2 days after the scan otherwise it was going to be another scan to check for any growth and then a d & c or a drug to get things to happen naturally.

My understanding is that sometimes the body can take a while to realise things aren't right and start doing the natural thing, some docs do prefer for you to wait and see as it can be better for your body if it happens naturally. It may well happen for you in the next week or two but is impossible to say for sure.

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minik8e View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote minik8e Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 19 October 2008 at 2:35pm
I agree with the others re. the recurrent m/c specialist in that it takes 3 before you can get a referral. I've now had 3, but we are going to go private anyway just to be seen sooner. It's costing us $180 for the first consultation, the tests are free but if I need an ultrasound it will be between another $75-$190 (depending on what they are looking for).

I said in the May thread, my heart goes out to you.
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linda View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote linda Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 19 October 2008 at 2:46pm
Oh Jaxs, I'm really sorry to hear this has happened again.   I made sure I had a few scans prior to the standard 12 week scan because I'd had two missed m/c and could not handle getting to 12 weeks and have it happen again. I've been able to have a D&C straight away which I have done just so that I can move on again.


Alex 6 and Harry 8
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote ElfsMum Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 19 October 2008 at 4:08pm
I have been through this...found out at 12 week scan and bubs died at 8 weeks..so we had D and C as I couldn't face miscarrying at home and it had already been 5 weeks almost.. and they tested my baby straight away..

Edited by foxxy_one
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote mummyofprinces Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 19 October 2008 at 7:36pm
I have also been through this. The shock of seeing that wee little bubba and then being told there is no heartbeat.... I will never forget it.

A missed miscarriage basically means bubs has died, but the body has not yet naturally passed it. I chose to have a D&C asap. Although some will not understand this, I just wanted it out. I was in so much shock. I always thought to miscarry you would cramp and bleed... I did regret that haste weeks later.

Jaxs, I am so sorry you have had to go through another loss hun.


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mylilmosaic View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote mylilmosaic Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 19 October 2008 at 8:16pm
Hi girls, thank you so much for your replies, it means alot that you have all shared your stories with me, it really helps me to prepare for what is yet to come.

Thing is, I thought the first m/c was just a one off and I didn't ever think that it would happen again, although it took me quiet a while before I was ready to get excited about this next pregnancy. And just at eight weeks I was starting to think yay this is gonna be a sticky wee baby. So gutted

But it helps to read of the success stories and know that we probably will have a baby one day, but gosh I never thought it would be this hard or emotionally painful.

Vanillabean big cause I know this must be really really hard for you at the moment as well, and thanks vb & minik8e for the idea of going to a specialist, I think we will do that. Wondering where in Hamilton we will find one, there is no recurrent miscarriage clinic, but there is a support group so might start with them to get some advice.

Thanks for all the kind thoughts girls, it really is appreciated, your all stars
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote minik8e Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 20 October 2008 at 7:26am
With my referral, my GP actually recommended if I could find someone in Hamilton that does public (such as the gynae who did my op for endo last year) it would be a better bet than going on it here in the Naki - because of the ratio of gynaes to patients. There is EPAC at Waikato - Early Pregnancy Assessment Clinic - which may have something to do with m/c also, as it's where I went with my m/c in June last year - it's just based in the Women's Health part by the maternity unit.
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mylilmosaic View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote mylilmosaic Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 20 October 2008 at 9:58am
Thanks Kate, I think thats where my dr is going to refer me to when I am ready, so I guess I will start there, just not sure when. I don't think I will leave it too long but am just waiting to see if this happens naturally first.
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minik8e View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote minik8e Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 20 October 2008 at 11:11am
They're really good at EPAC. The worst thing for me was that there's a lot of preg woman who are in the same waiting room (because it's just the general womens health/maternity area) and I found it really hard seeing all of these gorgeous amazingly pregnant women while I was waiting to find out what was happening with my own pregnancy and whether it was viable or not. There were also a lot of newborns coming in. So it was amazingly sad but amazingly beautiful at the same time.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Jakinty Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 20 October 2008 at 2:31pm
Jaxs, I just read your story and my heart dropped. The same thing happened to us just three weeks ago.

I opted for a d&c asap. That way I knew everything would be sorted, plus i got to sleep away the pain - i don't think i could have handled m/c at home.

big hugs and make sure you look after yourself physically and mentally
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote ElfsMum Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 20 October 2008 at 4:51pm
you also need to be careful of infection if left for too long...though i think that means months..:( with me they said the baby wasn't coming out anytime soon and that was 5 weeks later:( it's a personal decision and I truly feel for you as I know your pain
Mum to two amazing boys!
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mylilmosaic View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote mylilmosaic Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 20 October 2008 at 5:17pm
Im so so sorry this has happened to you as well jakinty big hugs, I found the first m/c so much easier to deal with but this one really sat me on my ar$e

Thanks foxy one, Im pretty sure I will be visiting the dr's later this week for the referral and ringing the hospital to try and get in early next week as I don't want to leave it too long either. Funny but my body does still think its a viable pregnancy, hope that starts subsiding soon.

Thanks for the info kate, I know you have recently been through a m/c as well and it is never easy. It does help to realise it not just me that actually quite alot of us go through this & go on to have healthy pregnancies.

Thanks heaps girls

Edited by jaxs
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote ElfsMum Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 20 October 2008 at 5:26pm
for me it didn't jax ...my body just carried on thinking it was viable (all the normal preg things except sickness but some people still get that) took 5 days to get DandC done after we found out :(

I know it helps to realise people go on to have healthy pregnancies but at the time I was just so mad and angry... why me etc:( all the usual grief stages I guess?:( but yes later on positive stories were great..
Mum to two amazing boys!
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