Hi I’m new

Hi ladies, I have been lurking and have found the forums really helpful - thanks. I actually posted this in the wrong thread (oops), but I think I'm in the right place now

I would like to have a wee rant, if you don't mind. I've been having ttc dramas and I don't really have anyone to talk to about it. My friends are either preggie / have babies - or they are career focused at this point and not interested in ttc.
Me and hubby ditched the birth control on the honeymoon and I came home pregnant! But sadly only a few days after a bfp, I was in the Emergency Dept. I had had sharp stabbing pains in one side and bleeding and PAAAIN! In the scan they never saw an embryo, but I was told it was most likely an ectopic. I was so lucky I didn't have to have surgery or the injection that removes the embryo from the tube.
Although I was only preggie for 5 weeks, I was so devastated, but after a week I put on a brave face and got on with it. I'm so happy I didn't tell all and sundry I was pregnant! It was really hard breaking the bad news to family members who did know. Sometimes when I see babies now I feel like crying!
Anyway I was told to wait two cycles and then I was free to try again. Well two cycles rolled around and I was free to try again this month. But goddamn it, at the time when I would have been ovulating I had the worst flu eva! No baby making was possible - snotty, feverish and deeply unsexy! Then I started having pains in my abdomen and thought it was a UTI. Turns out it was not a UTI and I eventually get sent to Emergency Dept again. Gyne suspected it was a cyst. But I had a scan today and no cyst, but maybe some scarring on the ovaries. I'm scared because I know scarring in the tubes can cause ectopics. I had really painful periods in my early twenties but just thought it was all part of being a woman - now I think maybe it was something more serious?? Going to gyne to discuss scan results tomorrow and I'm soo nervous to hear bad news. All I want now is a baby.
One more thing, I have wanted a baby for ages but tried to be a good girl and do all the right things careerwise, financially and even got married - and now I feel so depressed that this is happening and like I should've just thought stuff it a few years ago and got me a bun in the oven then!
That was quite long - sorry. If any of you have been in a similar situation or have any suggestions, I would love to hear from you:)

So sorry for your loss.

I had a suspected ectopic but luckily for me it turned out not to be the case. I do however have bad pain on my right ovary everytime I ovulate, I have had scans etc as they thought I had a cyst and all showed up clear and it has been put down to just normal ovulation pain (apparently some women can feel it more after being pregnant). I am now pregnant again and baby was concieved from that right ovary, I know this cos I know have a pregnancy cyst on the right hand side caused by the left over folicle that was fertilised.

So what i'm trying to say is that although you have pain it could well be nothing and that everything is absolutely fine. And don't beat yourself up about the choices you have made, I think getting financially setup and making sure you are in a stable and loving relationship before having a child is common sense and I really wish more people were sensible enough to do that.

Good luck today and fingers crossed its good news

I agree with Cuppatea - don't beat yourself up about the choices you've made, hindsight has an awful way of making us second-guess ourselves, but we do the things we do for a reason, and I commend you getting yourself on your feet careerwise and financially before deciding to have kids, some dys I wish I'd been a bit more forward-thinking!

Yes I agree nellybelly!

I'm going to get those ovulation predictor strips, - nice and cheap! Maybe if nothing happens for awhile I will move to the saliva ones. DH doesn't want to be told the day I'm ovulating because he says he will feel like a sperm donor!

I think I will be out of town working when I'm ovulating in Aug I wonder if my boss will let me stay home if I tell him I will be ovulating? Tee hee -yeh right!

He will so guess it is 'show time' - I will want to BD all around the big o day and its very unlike me to want to go for it nite after nite - especially on week nites! He will be very happy though