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FionaS
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Location: Auckland
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Topic: Is there a pattern? Posted: 19 October 2007 at 8:07am |
Warning...this is loooooooooooooong!
I saw the doc recently (for myself) and she was stunned at how unsettled Gabrielle was (screamed through the entire consult). She asked me if there is any pattern to the grizzling. I can't see one but wondered if I should post up a typical day and see if anyone can see one:
Sleeps through the night
Wakes around 7 (usually though not at the moment), cries until we get her up, breastfeeds sitting up in bed with me. As soon as she is done she starts wriggling and crying...doesn't want to stand, sit, play, cuddle, get down. Cuddles are always totally out of the question & so is sitting down with her on my knee...she must be moving.
After a good 10mins of crying and once we all get up she will run off and play happily for about 15 mins then she starts clinging and crying.
Get breakfast ready with her hanging off my legs crying
Feed her, she grizzles through each mouthful (kind a grumpy mmm mmm mmm sounds)
Finish breakfast and play. If I put music on, put the toys out and let her outside, she will be happy for up to 30mins some days, then starts crying and clinging.
Goes to bed 2 hours after getting up. Settles great and sleeps 1.5 to 2 hours.
Wakes from this happy. Happy for a while, providing there is lots to see and do. If we go out, will be happy for about 10 to 30mins then HAS to leave, no matter how much there is to do. Will end up totally inconsolable if we don't leave. The moment we leave (e.g. someones house, the playground, the house etc) she is fine and repeats the process until bedtime.
Settles and sleeps well for about 2 hours
Wakes crying and is inconsolable for up to 30mins then settles but is grizzly until after her bath.
After the bath is happy as Larry, runs around chatting and laughing and goes to bed without any fuss.
Have tried a combo of less stimulation / more stimuation and it seems that the more there is the better.
The above is typical...the past 2 weeks have been different...she's cried most of the day, wanted to be carried and needed 3 naps per day...probably teething.
Thanks for your objective eyes :)
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Mummy to Gabrielle and Ashley
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SMoody
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Joined: 09 January 2007
Location: New Zealand
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Posted: 19 October 2007 at 8:22am |
I think all kiddies go through this. Or I think at least they do. McKayla did this a few months ago as well. And she woke up seriously throwing tantrums from a nap ect.
It just went away after about 2 months. I didnt really do anything except to hug if she lets me and if she didnt just to let her sit and work it out herself by sitting close by until she calmed down and talking to her real softly. (some days she just didnt wanted that and just wanted me to sh*t up.
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FionaS
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Posted: 19 October 2007 at 8:36am |
Yes, I have been hoping it will pass when she has better comprehension + communication skills.
The thing for us is that this isn't a phase as such as she's always been this way.
Totally gorgeous when happy but she just struggles to be happy a lot of the time. Thought it would be good to get impartial eyes to look for a pattern :)
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Mummy to Gabrielle and Ashley
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Two Blondinis
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Posted: 19 October 2007 at 12:04pm |
The only pattern I can see is that she is worse after eating, maybe mention that to the Dr, there might be diegestive issues?!!? I know you've looked into Reflux and she doesn't have that, but it sounds like that or colic?!?!?
Also, if she is better with lots of stimulation perhaps try her in a day care for half a day (or a couple of hours?), it will give you a break and a change of scene for her. The other thing I'm thinking is that it might be good to have someone who spends a lot of time with lots of different kids to have a good look at her and see what they think is the problem.
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FionaS
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Posted: 19 October 2007 at 3:57pm |
Two Blondinis wrote:
The only pattern I can see is that she is worse after eating, maybe mention that to the Dr, there might be diegestive issues?!!? I know you've looked into Reflux and she doesn't have that, but it sounds like that or colic?!?!?
Also, if she is better with lots of stimulation perhaps try her in a day care for half a day (or a couple of hours?), it will give you a break and a change of scene for her. The other thing I'm thinking is that it might be good to have someone who spends a lot of time with lots of different kids to have a good look at her and see what they think is the problem. |
We did actually have a child psychologist (a really nice one) spend a day with us and their conclusion is that she is a "gifted" child who is very intelligent and frustrated with her limitations. They observed issues in self-regulation but said we won't know more until she is older. That is the general consensus...wait until she is 3 or so and then all will become clear.
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Two Blondinis
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Posted: 19 October 2007 at 4:20pm |
then I would definitely be sending her to daycare! I bet she would love it
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daikini
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Posted: 19 October 2007 at 6:31pm |
FionaS wrote:
We did actually have a child psychologist (a really nice one) spend a day with us and their conclusion is that she is a "gifted" child who is very intelligent and frustrated with her limitations. They observed issues in self-regulation but said we won't know more until she is older. That is the general consensus...wait until she is 3 or so and then all will become clear.
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Is it possible that the toys you have for her are too easy for her? As a gifted child, her mind would be ahead of her physical age and capabilities, and she may be getting bored quickly.
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Becca, mum of 2 girls & 3 boys
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james
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Posted: 20 October 2007 at 7:55am |
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SMoody
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Posted: 21 October 2007 at 9:02am |
If you are a SAHM what about Playcentre? She will be with a mixed age group. So she can copy the older kids quite a lot. Get stimilation from the other moms. You get a break from her but is still there if she needs you. She can chose what she wants to do when she wants to do it. (child led) so hopefully less chance of her getting frustrated.
She can explore what she wants and experiment with stuff in a safe environment. If you have one near you go attend the free visits they usually have and see how she actually finds it and if she is interested in it.
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bumblefoot
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Posted: 29 October 2007 at 2:40am |
From a nannys point of view, I would def second the above about the daycare/playcentre. The added stimulation and the integration with older children will give her someone to emulate that is closer to her age, and with her being gifted she will pick up the more advanced activities to occupy herself with, not to mention the added bonus of learning to play nicely with her peers/older kids. Learning the concept of sharing, taking turns etc. If you take her to one of the free/donation establishments, then if it doesn't turn out to be suitable for her then you haven't sent your money down the drain. Plus with the community run centres you can stay for the first few visits to see that she is settled and can have peace of mind that she is ok. then perhaps you can leave her for a few hours and have some Mummy time. Well earnt Mummy time by the sounds of it!
From the pattern point of view, it does seem that she is most unsettled around eating times, and it may be that she has a stomach upset, perhaps even something like irritable bowel syndrome, or that she is getting a sore tummy whe she eats. has her 'motions' been hard or more like diarhorrea sp? ? If they are hard then she may need more fibre in her diet, like kiwifruit or even weetbix for breakfast. On the other hand, if she has had loose stools it may be that she needs more binding foods like banana and bread products. Or that she has an allergy/upset to something in her diet.
Having said all this, some little ones are jsut mroe unsettled than others, and while it must seem very hard at the moment, it is quite likely she will outgrow it soon enough. I know that doesn't bring much comfort at the present time.
It sounds like you are doing all you can for her at the moment, and with some of the above suggestions you may find some improvement. There is no harm in trying I suppose.
Good luck with whatever you decide to do, and take comfort in the fact that the word 'gifted' is rarely used these days unless they have great cause to. All the best and do keep us posted.
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