is she normal ?

remember Julz kids tend to lash out and push the buttons of their main caregiver the most and any attention is good attention to them.

Did I ever tell you that my younger brother at 2 while mum was heavily pregnant with my youngest brother and she was picking me up from kindy took off down the long driveway (a good300mtrs) across a main road and down the backyard of the house across a street where there was a pool. Mum was saying she could never go anywhere with him without a harness on him.

She might just be a VERY active toddler, I'm not sure who normally diagnoses ADHD public health nurse? Mum would know but she's dealing with another brother drama haha.

Lots of kids I know are a handful, and Nia now climbs everything and just yesterday was climbing the stall bars at My Gym without me being there and running across the hotdog and falling off it. She also stands at the top of playgrounds and leans out without a second thought.

I don't think she is doing anything you wouldn't expect of that age, and also I would expect it to get worse before it gets better it's not called the terrible 2s for nothing.
The other thing to think about as well is she might be stressed from the EQ and that could be magnifying her behaviour. Around this age is when they really tend to lose it and can't express the emotions they are feeling and I'm pretty sure a lot of the time they don't even know what they are feeling so then trying to deal with an earthquake on top of that can't be much fun for them and must be really really hard for them to process. I've been told if they are talking about and role playing earthquakes, like building towers and shaking them down etc that that's a good sign that they are coping ok but if you are worried and if she's in daycare then it might pay talking to them as the ministry of education I'm pretty sure has people on hand that can help the little ones with dealing with the EQ stress, I know we were offered it through our sons kindy and also through barnados (they go to in home care)and I'm pretty sure the offer was from the MOE. Otherwise speaking to your gp about would be good as they should be able to put you in touch with the right people.

She sounds like a very high-energy, sensitive child but that doesn't mean she has a disorder. Sounds like you're doing an amazing job with her & are being very patient even though it must be very draining at times. I think the difference between ADHD kids and 'normal' but lively kids mainly has to do with their ability to concentrate on a task, but since all toddlers have short attention spans, I guess it's hard to tell the difference at that age. I've seen quite a few books at my local library on positive ways to deal with high-spirited children, how to recognise their needs & help them channel their energy into constructive behaviour... maybe you could check some of those out.

Don't have a lot to add but just wanted to say sounds like you are doing the very best, I did want to say how you describe her sounds quite typical of her age, not every kid for sure but some are more full on that others, I certainly know one wee boy very similar no fear, very independent etc... he is very clever too, at just 2.5 can ride a bike without stabilisers or anything, totally toilet trained due to independence, in fact there isn't much he can't do on his own!!! It does mean that this independence comes with a lot of tantrums as for all his fearlessness he is still a two year old and they have emotions they find hard to handle.

I like the idea of hanging out at a plunket centre, that would let you and somone totally new to you see and give you an idea.

 

Hey Julz, wow it sounds like you've got your hands full with DD (my DS is the complete opposite, pretty chilled and defo not a thrill-seeker) but that could just be normal toddler behaviour?  But I can see why you're worried as you've mentioned her bio father and aunt both have problems.  I'd try the Plunket approach firstly and if you still feel there's something not quite right (you know your DD best), then perhaps a paed is the next step?

It sounds like you are doing a fantastic job tho, keep up the good work xx

well today we have had a really bad day and its not even 1pm yet . Took amelia to the movies today for the toddler session of angelina ballerina with her step sister who is 6. There were other children her age and younger sitting there and watching and amelia loves angelina so i thought she might be ok , well i was very wrong! she liked the fact her fav show was on on a big screen but she was also running around like a mad child , screaming , trying to steal other childrens food , she bit me really hard and then she also went behind another mother sitting there minding her own buisness and hit her on the head for absolutly no reason , i was so embarassed we ended up leaving half way through . all day she has been into everything  and doing absolutly everything she knows shes not meant to doing including ripping up books , hitting me and her step sister , trying to knock the tv over, throwing her plate of food all over the ground and trying to climb out her hight chair and im about to loose the plot . Im coming on here to calm down and take a breather for a minute .

I just called her biological dad who hasnt seen her in well over a year and has nothing to do with her (his choice) and we spoke for a while about what he was like as a child and he told me that he was diagnosed at 5 with ADD and put on ritellin and he was on it up untilabout 4 years ago when he has decided not to take it (even tho he is meant to ) i was explainng her behaviours and he said it was him to a tee as a child . i knew he had behavioural issues but its nice to know exactly what and when it was diagnosed . I must admit i am getting very worried , she will be 2 next month and im sure her behaviour is more than just terrible twos , im sure its not all in my head . She is like a little hurricane from the moment she wakes up at 6.30am till the moment she goes to bed at 7pm , hyperactive all day every day and with all thats happend in chch over the past 10mths  (we are in a bad hit area without sewerage since sept quake and streets a real mess , power cuts frequantly, and since the last quake 5 days ago we still have no water at all so cant shower or wash or even do the dishes in our own home ) I really feel like my stress levels are at an all time high , maybe i need to get medicated LOL .

rant over . phew

Edited by julz85

Awww hugs, it sounds like super hard work. Have you tried cutting certain foods out of her diet? This site has some really good info about what can cause problems. One of the more common foods is brocolli! Here is the best link, hopefully you can find something usefull on there. Good luck

Oh Julz sorry to hear you had a bad day.
A friend and I were talking the other day about behavioural issues (she is an ECE teacher and worked for Porse) and she also said that often ADHD is diagnosed when in fact the behaviour is often linked to food allergies or intolerances. Maybe ask for a referral as Crafty suggested but in the meantime I would suggest looking at Wriggles website or look at AandCsmum's book as that might help as well.

Julz, huge hugs, I imagine that as much as you love her you'd be happy to be rid of her? I remember hating my girl constantly dreading when I had to get her & like you loving to escape to work.

PM me with your email address & I'll find my copy of the most up to date food list & email it to you, you might like to try eliminating some of the fruits/veges to see if they affect her?

Don't worry about nutrients as once you start removing additives & offending foods your body is more able to take up the nutrients out of the foods that are left. I have regular blood tests to make sure it works for me.