medical problem or just bad luck?

I have been pondering this for some time in regards to toby.   

The kid has very rarely woken up happy, wether it be in the morning or whenever else he has been asleep... he is a grumpy child quite often saying ouch as he is screaming and crying but unable to produce anything sore ... and now he says he doesnt know when you ask what is wrong... quite often we get hysterical screaming fits, where he is inconsolable and hugging never calms him down...

anyhoo so i finally mentioned it to the doc today and he said it could either be an intolerance to something...or just his personality ...

**big sigh** i guess its just going to be my lot in life to deal with grumpy bum toby!



Edited by Bizzy

If it's an intolerance to something, did the doc offer to get some testing done or just leave it at that.  Poor Toby, sounds like whatever it is, is painful. I guess the only thing you can do, is try cutting stuff out and seeing if that makes any difference.  It could be a diet thing???

Bizzy - my nephew was a bit like Toby, and still does not wake the happiest if he sleeps during the day, one of the things my sister has done is get rid of all additives and preservitves in his food and he has changed completely. One main thing if you do this is that if he has the slightest thing with A or P in it he does go off the rails very easily. It maybe something to consider as this seems to be his "intolerences". Probably not that helpful but maybe worth a go. Good luck

emily, sounds like we have similar children... toby is going to be 3 in july.
mel the doc pretty much said that too - just try and eliminate diff food groups.
oh and when i asked the doc if he would benefit from osteo he nearly laughed out loud...

i'm tossing up about doing a food dairy for him and seeing if i can see a pattern... or maybe just working on getting him to sleep better. sleep has never been his strong point! he even has bags under his eyes...

Take him to the osteo if you want to. My doc also did a bit of an eye roll when I mentioned it but I was willing to try anything. Getting him seen by someone re: food allergies could help. Master 20 mths doesn't get eczema yet his 3yr old brother does, so am already a little wary of what I feed him. I do have to say he is better than what he was but I do notice the days when he doesn't get enough sleep he is diabolical. Gets needy, loses the plot over the smallest thing, I'm not allowed out of the room and has to be carried everywhere. Ppl used to make fun of me as I was sooo fussy about not upsetting his sleep routine as I knew what was in store for me if I did. If he isn't getting good sleeps it could be contributing. I feel for you, it's not easy dealing with them sometimes. You should just keep being the great Mum that you are, while still trying all other avenues.

I never ever wake up happy either. I could wake up ater 23 hours uninteruppted sleep, after dreaming of George clooney, waking next to george clooney and I would still be a grumpy b!tch. Its a constant source of argument here. It sjust me. I'm happy most of the time (although ATM I am a bit meloncholic - rotten pmt) i'm just not a good riser. Suck for you, I know it sucks having a grump in the house, especially a little grump.

ooops didnt see your post there emma - dont ask how i missed it, i must be going blonde!

i dont know if i am "worried" as such but i have wondered if maybe there was something i could do for him. of course when he was younger i did worry that he had something really wrong with him... but then i did it with gabriel and eden too!   

and then of course i have wondered if it is just bad parenting and i know that he is worse if i react badly. maybe i just want to blame something/one?!

This is the website we looked at for my nephew.

http://nac.allergyforum.com/additives/

All the E numbers on the left are what you find on packets of food and you will be surprised at how many some things have in them. I think one of the sections is colourings but not sure now which one it is.

No advice, just sympathy (not quite the right word perhaps).

I understand the cynicism re: osteos. Ours is a chiroptractor and Elle has been totally different since seeing him. That does not mean she is perfect, or always happy, but that masses of her tension and grizzliness as lifted. She is still subjected to the normals ups and downs toddlers go through and hence I know some people say "oh the osteo didn't work" but it really really did. It worked wonders for several of my friends kids too BUT it doesn't work for every problem. I an skeptical too but all I can go by is the evidence we see every day in our home.

I'm not yet sure whether these kids just have difficult temperaments or whether it is something more. All I can say is that we've gone down every single avenue with Elle and the chiro was the only thing that made an ounce of difference. She is still very stroppy, prone to tantrums, strong willed and often grumpy so perhaps that is temperament. I'm not prepared to pin it down to any one thing as I don't what to end up with a self-fulfilling prophecy thing going on.

One theory I have is that we all fall on a spectrum with regard to our senses. At one end you have autistic, at the other adhd and in between you have the rest of us. We are all affected by things differently. I think that for some of us, the world just bugs us more than it does others. Maybe some of us have over-ative central nervous systems so are more irritated by things than others. That accounts for the huge range of "normal". Just my theory.

Other thing that I just thought about I know someone that does neurolink. Perhaps try that and get an assessment. They should be able to work out what is going on in his whole system and lets his brain take care of it. Might be something totally unrelated that is causing him to be grumpy or they like everyone say maybe it is jsut his temperament. Pm me if you want details.